Dysfunctional family!

NAS62449 over 5 years ago

does anyone have more than 1 child with ASD?

i have 2 boys close in ages. 1 has a diagnosis, 1 does not but I am sure he has it too.

i know all siblings fight but they are at each other’s throats constantly.

we cannot have any family outing without shouting, arguing. Even physical fighting.

it makes life so hard and unless we all split up as a family it’s hard to have a nice time.

i can’t help comparing to friends families and how chilled out life seems in comparison.

this then leads me to think is this my parenting? Am I to blame?!

then I think we’ll their kids don’t have SEN.

can anyone relate?!

thanks

NAS62449 over 5 years ago in reply to Anthony

That’s reassuring you get on as adults. Thanks.
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NAS62449 over 5 years ago in reply to Plastic

Thanks

you've reminded me it is normal and not all my fault.
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Anthony over 5 years ago in reply to Plastic

I was best man for my brother - so similar outcomes!
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Plastic over 5 years ago in reply to Anthony

Yeah - they eventually grow out of it - my brother was my best man when I got married.
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Anthony over 5 years ago

Hmmm... you could pick tour favourite one and sell the other to the zoo or circus? I jest... me and my brother used to be at each other’s throats a lot but as we got older we got along well - it’s something time and maturity will sort out. Unfortunately unless you are fortunate to have siblings that naturally fall into some kind of hierarchy - they will always vie for position - not wanting to be seen as weakest etc. Equally you can’t force them to ‘like’ one another - so it’s a bit of a tough situation.
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Plastic over 5 years ago

All brothers fight - it's normal - I've NEVER met any boys who don't hate/fight each other. The usual rule is 'no visible marks' so the parents don't find out. I've had my nose broken twice by my twin brother - couldn't hide that. .

You're not dysfunctional - but you will worry and get annoyed. Why not tag-team them if they loathe each other so much? Just take one each and do separate things - you will find it so much less stress even if it doesn't *feel* correct or normal - lowering stress makes it all worth it.

Other families always put on a 'public' face but it's the same everywhere - their sons will be kicking the crap out of each other too.
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