• Replies 6 replies
  • Subscribers 70 subscribers
  • Views 1551 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Please advise - 11year old brother with ASD - anxiety and medication?

NAS67002

I'm super worried about my 11 year old brother. He was diagnosed early on as ASD. He has improved a lot over the years and there is still a long way to go. However, recently, he has been worrying a lot. Like he watched a scary video on YouTube about 'Bloody Mary' and it literally had him paralysed by fear for weeks - avoiding mirrors (literally walking backwards to not face a mirror - it got so frustrating I would make him look into a mirror to get over it and he would be in floods of tears) and he couldn't tell us that it was about this Bloody Mary video because he was scared of saying the word 'Bloody Mary'. One day, we figured it out and had a long talk with him explained everything and he was so relieved - he also explained the cause he was so worried about it, the word 'Bloody Mary' would ring in his mind so he would literally replace it with 'Bloody Mongrel' or something silly to get rid of the thought of Bloody Mary. He will now say Bloody Mary, laugh and joke about it - honestly, it completely felt like a weight lifted off his shoulder and we are so grateful. But alas, now he has found something else to worry about. He is scared about supernatural things and he has these supernatural monsters that he again watched a video about ringing in his mind and its upsetting him - he is regularly crying, withdrawn and his concentration is worse than normal - he will literally start day dreaming into the air when we are talking to him about something. It's upsetting and makes me feel hopeless. I want more than anything for him to have a normal life, he doesn't have to be remarkable or do anything amazing, but just a normal life, a job, get married have kids and be happy. But when I see him regress like this, it breaks my heart and honestly makes me depressed because I just want him to be okay - to be normal.

Anyways, my main concern at the moment is that these anxieties keep cropping up and we have tried talking and reassuring and sometimes it works wonders and other times it doesn't. I also want to mention that our father passed away in 2016 and sometimes he gets anxious about losing more of his family/seeing his father again etc. and it is extremely upsetting to see and deal with. There is a theme of anxiety/OCD in my family but I want to stop this getting worse whilst he is still young. Please advise any experiences with medication? I think that would be the best route for him if I am honest but I am also super against psychiatric medication as I don't want it to have side effects or affect his develpoment.

I would love to hear some experiences/opinions/views - this is my first post and I look forward to speaking with you all. Wishing you and your families the best during these crazy times, stay safe.

Parents

  • Hi, 

    My son is 11. He suffers from anxiety too. He was referred to camhs. The waiting list is long so had a few sessions with a charity called believe to achieve. They helped him to express how he felt. He made things like, happy balls, worry boxes. He can also jot things into a diary when he feels down. 

    My sons anxiety gets quite bad, He refused to go outside at all for the first 4 weeks of the corona virus of fear he would get the virus. I had to electively home school due to the pressure of the SATS ( then they closed the schools - im still having to homeschool full time )

    It depends on your brothers abilities and things he likes ( you know him best) My son loves superheros and ps4, so I use his toys to get him to tell me how he feels and whats worrying him through his toys during play. He gets very anxious when asked direct questions. 

    I personally dont want my son on any medication so will try alternative therapy until nothing else works. But that's just my opinion,not the right one, just a preference for now! 

    Children with autism may have a delay with processing bereavement, so he may be grieving, maybe speak to your GP especially since you've mentioned your brother has expressed concerns regarding losing other family members and seeing your Dad. They may be able to do a counselling referral.

    This website has some fantastic information about effective communication. Since i've changes my approach with my son, I have really noticed a difference. 

    Can I also mention,  for me, living with high functioning autism is hard and it is emotionally difficult at types. I worry about him all the time, life is a roller coaster, an amazing roller coaster. but a roller coaster ;)

    However, my sons qualities are brilliant. He is honest, kind, to the point, funny and extremely knowledgeable about marvel and dc.

    I wouldn't change him. Autism makes my son who he is him, if I take that away, I take his personality away.

    Remember, autism is a lifelong condition, you may see your brother at times improve, but he will probably always need some form of support from you.

    You dont mention your age, i know it can be difficult for siblings. Remember, you are doing a fab job at supporting your brother. Remember to find time to look after your own wellbeing. 

Reply

  • Hi, 

    My son is 11. He suffers from anxiety too. He was referred to camhs. The waiting list is long so had a few sessions with a charity called believe to achieve. They helped him to express how he felt. He made things like, happy balls, worry boxes. He can also jot things into a diary when he feels down. 

    My sons anxiety gets quite bad, He refused to go outside at all for the first 4 weeks of the corona virus of fear he would get the virus. I had to electively home school due to the pressure of the SATS ( then they closed the schools - im still having to homeschool full time )

    It depends on your brothers abilities and things he likes ( you know him best) My son loves superheros and ps4, so I use his toys to get him to tell me how he feels and whats worrying him through his toys during play. He gets very anxious when asked direct questions. 

    I personally dont want my son on any medication so will try alternative therapy until nothing else works. But that's just my opinion,not the right one, just a preference for now! 

    Children with autism may have a delay with processing bereavement, so he may be grieving, maybe speak to your GP especially since you've mentioned your brother has expressed concerns regarding losing other family members and seeing your Dad. They may be able to do a counselling referral.

    This website has some fantastic information about effective communication. Since i've changes my approach with my son, I have really noticed a difference. 

    Can I also mention,  for me, living with high functioning autism is hard and it is emotionally difficult at types. I worry about him all the time, life is a roller coaster, an amazing roller coaster. but a roller coaster ;)

    However, my sons qualities are brilliant. He is honest, kind, to the point, funny and extremely knowledgeable about marvel and dc.

    I wouldn't change him. Autism makes my son who he is him, if I take that away, I take his personality away.

    Remember, autism is a lifelong condition, you may see your brother at times improve, but he will probably always need some form of support from you.

    You dont mention your age, i know it can be difficult for siblings. Remember, you are doing a fab job at supporting your brother. Remember to find time to look after your own wellbeing. 

Children
No Data