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5 year old son struggling

StephEwen90

Things have been especially tough lately. 

Last year our now 5 year son was diagnosed with autism. We always knew there was something special/different about him but it took awhile to figure things out.

It was a relief in a way, knowing why certain things were happening. Why he was having intense meltdowns, speech delays, and hitting himself when angry. We got him into every program and government aid that we could. He started school last fall and had been excelling greatly with the help of his teacher and teacher aide. 

This whole Covid-19 things has completely thrown him off. The routine being disrupted, not being able to take him to his favourite places and being literally quarantined with his siblings he isn’t used to being around 24/7 anymore. His meltdowns that were significantly reduced since last fall have greatly returned and have been happening 3/5 times a day or more. 

I’m struggling to cope as well. I’m trying my best to come up with a routine and give him different activities but it all feels like too much some days. We also have a 1 and a 3 year old so I’m trying to make sure I give them ALL attention but so much of me goes to making sure that Brody’s’ (son with ASD) meltdowns are calmed. My husband is essential services so it’s mainly just me. I’m tired. I’m exhausted. I’m feeling overwhelmed. We really relied on the help from his school, his extra curricular activities and our outings. I feel like I’m not enough for him, or for his siblings.

Its an extra hard day today. If anything, it would be nice to know I’m not alone in this. Who else can relate? 

  • You’re not alone!

    My ASD son (25mnths) is really struggling too atm, his meltdowns and head-banging/hitting himself has increased and nothing seems to be calming him down whilst we are stuck inside at the moment. 

    I find I’m struggling with it myself too, feeling helpless/guilty but also exhausted.

    Keep trying to remind yourself though that this is temporary - it will pass. Routines will change again and we will slowly get back to normal.

    You are enough, we will all get through this (although it’s definitely not easy) 

    X

  • Hi there. I would like to say, you doing a amazing job. I got two kids with asd, and it is exhausting and overwhelming , my oldest is 5 and have 2/3 meltdown during the day. I relied on the school to help with activities, no luck at moment. My oldest doesn’t like the change of Routines - he loves school. My husband a key worker as well. One thing I was told you are enough - even thinking how are you going to do this and at the end of the day getting a cuddle from my oldest is enough and to make me proud ( don’t like to be cuddle) take care. S

  • I'm not a parent, but I am an autistic adult, and I can relate to a lot of what your son's going through in terms of struggling with the change, having routines disrupted etc. I can also empathise with your feelings of being overwhelmed - we're all coping with a lot at the moment.

    I'd highly recommend Purple Ella's YouTube channel - she makes incredibly helpful videos, and she's doing a special weekly livestream to support autistic people and their families through Covid-19. She's both autistic and a parent of autistic children, so you might find some of her advice really helpful.