Home-Learning Refusal - please help.

Hi, 

I am new to the community. I am feeling pretty desperate and would love some help.

A little background: my 11 y/o has a diagnosis of Aspergers and also has ALN (undiagnosed but my fight with the school is a long story). He hates school and for years has refused to learn at home in a formalised way i.e. refusing to do homework. In his mind, home and school are very separate. 

Now the schools have shut, I've been trying to do bits of informal learning with him and his school is in the process of setting up Google classroom. However, he is refusing to do ANYTHING. I've tried to follow his interests, such as making PowerPoints of his favourite actors and directors, we've been observing our dog's post-walk behaviour and recording it, I'm encouraging him to read his comics. Now he's refusing to do any of it and is having frequent meltdowns. 

I've not made timetables and in no way expect him to sit at the kitchen table for hours a day filling in worksheets (which he wouldn't anyway!) but even the most informal, fun activities I can think of are met with anger, meltdowns and verbal attacks. 

My husband thinks I should let the learning go and focus on his emotional wellbeing. I fully agree BUT I am worried that if lock down goes on for months, he'll get further and further behind (and he's already 2 school years behind) and when he does return to school, he'll be completely switched off to learning. 

What approaches are other parents taking to home school refusal?

 I'd really appreciate some help. Thank you! 

Parents
  • Hi I'm in the same boat. I've finally decided to ignore the school for now I will catch him up. 

    We were both getting too stressed. I was struggling with everything changing and being ill. My boys struggling with everything changing and being home for around 3 weeks as he was Ill too. 

    School keep bugging me but I wrote to the head explaining and said hes welcome to come over but I'm recovering from corona so I wouldnt recommend it.

    It's not ideal but mental health is now our priority

    All the best

  • Thank you for replying. You're right, mental health should be the priority and really, why make more stress when things are stressful enough already?!

    I hope that you and your family feel better soon and that things settle for you all. Take care. 

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