Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, for the last 2 years my daughter has had speech and language intervention, resulting in assessements which have concluded she is 'average' for her age. her speech is very immature and she still frequently mis pronounces words and gets her 'he', 'she' pronouns mixed up all the time. In addition to this, her tantrums are frequent, most of the time if she hasn't got her own way. Tantrums can involve her forcing herself to froth at the mouth, calling us stupid, crying, lying on the floor. She has an incredible amount of energy which we try and get her to burn off by going to the park, she also goes swimming but she never seems tired and every night is a fight to get her to bed, despite bedtime routines, reward charts etc etc.
I hate the thought of her being unhappy and feeling like the odd one out but she displays no remorse over her behaviour, every day is like ground hog day in terms of her behaviour. She also displays no empathy whenver anyone gets hurt or is upset, she's more interested in the visual aspect 'is it bleeding?'. She is also very unaware of what day of the week it is, when her birthday is, when christmas is etc. I know most 5 year olds maybe have no concept of time, but i would have thought by now some elements would be there. She isn't at all tactile either, even when she wakes up in the morning, she won't say hi, or good morning. Very limited with her hugs too.
Sorry for the essay, but i guess we really need help with managing her behaviour at home as it's affecting us all and making for a really sad house at the moment. We have had speech and language involved, and a child psychologist and we have our first ASD assessment next week. If she is diagnosed I am wondering what the next steps might be for us. Thanks for any advice.
thank you emma and crystal. We think her hearing may be affected as she had grommets put in 2 years ago and one has only recently fallen out. She has hearing test in an few weeks time.
we have 2 other children and our daughter is the middle one. My heart just breaks for her when I see her so detatched from everything and when she gets excited about something, she sort of strains her arms and moves them up and down, like a rush of adrenaline. I keep clinging on to the thought that she is different and different is good in so many ways, but also can't help but project into the future and worry about how she will cope after primary 1 as the learning side gets harder and children become more aware of differences in other children. Emma, she is in a mainstream school at the moment and i have to say they ahve been wonderful. There are 2 other children with autism who are in the older school and their care has been managed very well apparently.
Thank you both for your kinds words. i'll make sure i keep you posted as to a diagnosis. x
hi alic - life sounds difficult..... how long has it been going on? It's harder when speech is delayed. My son was 5 before he spoke - then it was a short phrase. He cd understand a number of words/phrases prior to that. Does she understand short, simple commands? My son continues to confuse his pronouns. He prefers to call himself by his 1st name + rarely says "I". When he's been upset I've found it tends to be because of a change of routines which are important to him ( although he can accept certain changes with no bother at all). Or being in the wrong environment (too noisy, too chaotic, with people who don't understand etc). He wd then self-harm because the tension wd get too much for him. Can you think of anything at home or school that has changed which may in turn be affecting her behaviour? I know it's difficult, but it cd only be a change we wd regard as minor but I might not seem that way to her. I hope the assessment process goes smoothly + quickly for you. bw
Hi, my son is going through a similar problem, he is 4. Our house too has become very sad as we just dont know what to do to make it better, despite professional support. Sometimes they just go through bad patches and the professionals themselves are stumped. Is your daughter in a mainstream or special school? Emma :)