• Replies 5 replies
  • Subscribers 68 subscribers
  • Views 1430 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Struggling family!

NAS66368

Hello, I'm new here & looking for advice.

My six year old son is going through diagnosis for autism/adhd. He has terrible outbursts of anger/hatred towards myself, dad, brother & the dog. These outbursts aren't really triggered by anything in particular, some days just coming home from school starts him off. We go for a walk or to the park after school most days & can be out for anything from 20 minutes to 2 hours depending on how his day has been & how he feels. He is constantly banging doors, cupboards, drawers & anything else that makes a noise but, he doesn't like noise & cries or yells if it gets too much. He has broken 3 of the kitchen cupboard doors over the last week & when we try to tell him it's not acceptable to break these things & try to give him consequences for his actions he screams, hits, kicks, spits or laughs at us, slams doors, bangs on the walls & throws things. We have tried everything that the professionals have suggested & other things we've found online but to no avail. He doesn't understand his emotions so is unable to tell us if he's upset, angry or happy.He's recently been rejected by iscan due to age & prematurity (he was born at 28 weeks). Has anyone been through anything like this or can anyone suggest something we can try please?

He is an adorable but frustrated/confused little boy & this is heart breaking as I feel as though we're not parenting him correctly. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Parents

  • Hi, thank you for sharing and I'm sorry to hear that you've been having a difficult time recently. I'm an autistic adult who was diagnosed as an adult, and there are things that have helped me in the last few years that I hadn't considered that I had needed. I was wondering if you have tried noise cancelling headphones with him? Sometimes just the small day to day background noises can lead to sensory overload. Also I was wondering, what is he like with music? Does he seem to become calmer when listening to songs or when trying to play an instrument? I'm not an expert but for me music has a very integrative effect on my mind and produces a very soothing effect, and playing music was very important for me growing up. Wishing you all the best.

  • in reply to Rach

    I also had a thought, this may not be helpful as everyone has a unique experience with being on the spectrum, but what has helped me immensely as an adult is people speaking to me at half of their normal speed, and supporting this with gestures. Growing up, I had a lot of difficulty with following verbal conversation due to the speed of it, which would lead to anxiety and frustration with myself as I wasn't able to join in, even though I wanted to. The pressure of trying to follow conversation verbally also seems to produce uncomfortable physical sensations, and expends a high level of energy very quickly. Communicating visually is much more comfortable for me, and I watch TV with subtitles on, and gesticulate more with people who know I'm autistic. I've also started asking people to speak to me slowly, which has been incredibly helpful, and am going to learn Makaton for sign language support.

Reply
  • in reply to Rach

    I also had a thought, this may not be helpful as everyone has a unique experience with being on the spectrum, but what has helped me immensely as an adult is people speaking to me at half of their normal speed, and supporting this with gestures. Growing up, I had a lot of difficulty with following verbal conversation due to the speed of it, which would lead to anxiety and frustration with myself as I wasn't able to join in, even though I wanted to. The pressure of trying to follow conversation verbally also seems to produce uncomfortable physical sensations, and expends a high level of energy very quickly. Communicating visually is much more comfortable for me, and I watch TV with subtitles on, and gesticulate more with people who know I'm autistic. I've also started asking people to speak to me slowly, which has been incredibly helpful, and am going to learn Makaton for sign language support.

Children
No Data