Private assessment

Hi Louise, I am new to this site as my son received his (private) ASD diagnosis today. Like you I had suspected ASD and ADHD and the more I learned the more I thought he would benefit from us all knowing why he may behave in the way that he does and why he found certain things difficult - it had started to impact his mental health, confidence and resilience and so I was keen to get him some support. His GP would refer him to CAMHs but the wait was a year and so we decided to go private. It is expensive but if it helps then I feel I have saved my son a year at school where his teachers wouldn't listen to us as his parents. With the diagnosis I now feel more able to speak to his school and obtain the support which his psychiatrist and psychologist have recommended. Having said that, it sounds like your school are being supportive and they are obliged to put support in place if there may be a possiblity of SEND. Prior to diagnosis, while we were still debating whether to go ahead with the assessment I also spoke to my local council advisory service and they offered support in working through an ECHP process and in explaining my rights in relation to the school's stance on things which was very helpful. We decided to get the diagnosis first but the bar for the SENCO to help is lower than your school seems to be suggesting - it may be worth having a look at the SEND provision in your area - we found loads of info on our local council website which helped with discussions with school, not least in terms of what we were entitled to under the law.

Also channels like this one can help, sense of understanding is a big thing. Not yet found any relevant Youtubers in her age range though.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCk5aCrQAppGZ8atiOpgYZ1A

Are there any options of somewhere with smaller classes or less activity? Also is it possible to for her to move some of her written work to a normally unused or quiet room? I know you said adjustments were in place but just checking.

Is she allowed headphones? Things like that if do-able can make a much more affordable solution, and often better in long run.

Also I'd look at attitude of staff where she may end up if you get the early assessment, one thing I've noticed in my research is those of us who use the language of disability over difference for example and up with more prominent anxiety and depression. Try to make sure they emphasis making most of strengths as much if not more then overcoming weaknesses. Otherwise it may trade one problem for another.

Sorry I can't give more definitive answers

She isn’t happy if I’m honest, she has always felt different and now feels that she wants answers. School is extremely difficult due to it being busy and loud and she feels very exhausted each day when she comes home. She also struggles with noises in the class room such as people tapping and people kicking chairs. Home life is complicated due to Certain things but too much to go into here. We have a great relationship and I’m so pleased that she is able to communicate how she feels and how we can potentially help. Still unsure as to what we do with the assessment x

My main question would be, is she happy how things are?

On balance of probability from what you said, you have a good understanding of your daughter and open communication both ways, which is the most important thing.

So relax, you got this off to a great start :)

Unless there are any signs of distress around her school life, don't panic.

If you do want something more to get on with, encouraging creative/alternate forms of expression she may enjoy is always good.