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Son diagnosed with ASD but what do I do now?

NAS64354

So my 9 yo son got his diagnosis a few months back now, but what do I do with this? It's a bit like the doctors say "Yeah he has ASD, here are a few support websites, bye."

His behaviour has been quite odd (more unusual than normal)  rececently after moving school. He's constantly grumpy and is having major mood swings and has had a few bizarre melt downs over the most unusual things. He's always had melt downs and his quirks and I know that comes with the ASD, but it seems as if he's not happy anymore and something's not right. I've tried talking to him and he says he doesn't know what's up and shrugs it off.

Am I supposed to be taking him to see someone? Or am I supposed to just take this as how life is? 

  • in reply to NAS64354

    therapy is not a punishment (who doesn't love getting to talk about themselves for an hour!) as long as its not ABA, because i have seen it first hand and even quit my job because i could not morally deal with the "training" it was horrific.  

  • Former Member
    Former Member in reply to NAS64354

    Parents often report on this forum that children are fine at school but change for the worse when home. This article don’t fit your situation exactly, but it does give some good tips on creating an autism friendly environment. http://annsautism.blogspot.com/2019/11/from-secure-accommodation-to-supported.html

  • Thank you for the responses. I'm quite torn then with what to do. I don't want it to seem like I'm punishing him by taking him to see someone, but I want him to have the support. He's golden at school so I don't feel like I can get support there. When the teacher asks how he is, he just responds with fine. 

  • So your ASD son has just moved schools and is now his behaviour has worsened? Well obvs! That is a huge change to his life and it will really effect him. As a child it is really hard to understand why we feel the way we do and then explain that. especially in young people with autism. Communication is more  difficult for autistics. The best thing you can do is learn as much as you can. Therapy is fantastic. Tony Attwood is a leading specialist in the field, I would recommend him, read his books, educate yourself as much as possible, go to therapy and understand that your kid has just had his world turned upside down, and if he has just been diagnosed and knows about it. . That might effect his feelings of self worth. A nice thing to do is focus on people on the spectrum throughout history who have changed the world in art, music, science and engineering. Show him how he does indeed have a superpower and focus on his positives. Meltdowns come with feelings of extreme shame and embaressed. Positivity is key, autism is hard on the parent but harder on the autistic person. Seek support for yourself as well 

  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hello, I’m not the parent of an autistic child, so I can’t give you first hand advice, but NAS does offer a parent to parent service which you can find here. The NAS helpline can be found here.

    I would suggest that you try to join a local group of parents with autistic children. It is always good to talk to other people who have similar experiences and share knowledge. You should be able to find out what groups there are via your local or county council web site.

    If your son has recently started a new school, this may well be why he is having extra problems at the moment. We don’t like change.

    It may also be a good idea to keep a diary to try and identify what sensory experiences he has problems with. Some people adopt a sensory diet and try to limit incoming information. Things like noise-cancelling headphones can be quite helpful.

    This blog is by a mother of an autistic child, she’s been writing it for 6 years now so it may be worth a look. http://flappinessis.com/

    I wish you all the best, Graham.

  • Yes it will help him in later life if he has structured support as an adult with out it he will just be neglected. 

    To learn to deal with life with autism as a child with support will allow him to prepare for adult life, I don't know about you but when I left school I felt like life had punched me in the balls, bill insurance's , bank accounts, credit cards ect.

    Plus as an adult I can't get any support period, get him everything available put him in a school that has a good reputation for educating autistic children

    Plus if you can a specialist in autism would be good to have for proper advice.