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Experiences of pregnancy and birth after getting ASD diagnosis?

lemondifficult

Wasn't sure whether to post in the 'medical' forum or here! Anyway - 

I'm 34, got my formal diagnosis of ASD earlier this year. I'm very skilled at masking/social mimicry, to the extent most people I know wouldn't ever believe I was autistic. My life looks very 'normal' on the surface - I'm married and have a full-time job. My husband and I would like to have a child but I am absolutely terrified of my diagnosis not being taken seriously by medical professionals when I'm pregnant and when discussing birth choices, as I seem to be coping so well with life and I don't fit the autism 'stereotype' that most people are familiar with.

I have a really low pain threshold, and I am terrified of having my concerns dismissed and being made to give birth in a way which I know will send me into meltdown and traumatise me for life - not to mention being hugely dangerous to the baby as I will be in such a state and unable to respond to the midwives' instructions. 

I'm wondering if there's anyone on here who already had a formal ASD diagnosis before you got pregnant, and whether midwives/consultants actually took it into account, especially with regards to birth choices? If you expressed anxiety about labour/birth, did they take your concerns seriously? 

Thanks so much to anyone who feels able to share their experiences.

Parents
  • in reply to NAS75629

    Goodness. Each person must make their own decision, but in truth our off spring are always a surprise and EVERYONE inherits some talents and abilities and some detriments from their parents. It's called being human. 

    I had no idea I was autistic when I had my lovely son. He's NT but he has other inherited gifts and problems, because he is human. 

    Am I sorry I was born autistic? No! Would I have decided not to have my son had I known? No! Would I tell him not to have kids because neurodivergence is sprinkled about the family tree? No! Is my son glad he was born? Yes! Is he happy I'm his mum? Well, he tells me often I did a good job and he loves me.

    NT or ND my grand kids will I'm sure all be just lovely and be deeply loved by their autistic nana as they are.

    Anyway, being born ND may bring its challenges, but it can also bring its joys. And we don't have to live a life of 'suffering' with enough love and understanding. And who's to say what any child will turn out like or predict what they might achieve?

Reply
  • in reply to NAS75629

    Goodness. Each person must make their own decision, but in truth our off spring are always a surprise and EVERYONE inherits some talents and abilities and some detriments from their parents. It's called being human. 

    I had no idea I was autistic when I had my lovely son. He's NT but he has other inherited gifts and problems, because he is human. 

    Am I sorry I was born autistic? No! Would I have decided not to have my son had I known? No! Would I tell him not to have kids because neurodivergence is sprinkled about the family tree? No! Is my son glad he was born? Yes! Is he happy I'm his mum? Well, he tells me often I did a good job and he loves me.

    NT or ND my grand kids will I'm sure all be just lovely and be deeply loved by their autistic nana as they are.

    Anyway, being born ND may bring its challenges, but it can also bring its joys. And we don't have to live a life of 'suffering' with enough love and understanding. And who's to say what any child will turn out like or predict what they might achieve?

Children
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