My son wanting/ trying to be 1st all the time

My son is 7, he has high functioning autism. This past year he's started to be obsessed with having to be first for nearly everything, if it's getting down the stairs first before his little brother, brushing his teeth first, getting out the car first, getting to the school gate first, putting his school book on the top of the pile first, being first in the line at school, etc etc, the list could go on.

It's been a big issue at school, and at home, but mainly school. I've tried everything I can think of, read up on things, asking for advice from professionals, googling stuff, and nothing seems to work. My last attempt was a book I've just purchased called "ME first" by Helen Lester, couple of parents recommend it, saying it helped their autistic child, so I thought it was worth a try, day 1 reading the book at bed time tonight, and he never said anything just took himself to bed, was a little surprised. It was mentioned to read the book for about a month, so my plan is to do it over the summer holidays. Is anyone else going through this? 

Another issue at school is sharing, my son gets obsessed with items or his belongings, he likes his own space. He doesn't want to share what he's been given to use in a group for his work, such as cubes or counters. He has a little brother so we work on sharing alot at home, my son doesn't like big groups of children to work in, he would rather work with a couple of children. I don't think his school truly understand him or his teacher doesn't truly understand autism. Does anyone elses child struggling with theses issues. Feel like I'm fighting a losing battle. 

Parents
  • I wouldn't see this as a negative trait. In fact I was exactly the same at school. I had to be first at everything. The result? I aced my GCSEs and went to a top university. Over the years I've lost that drive. I no longer have the drive to be first. It's too exhausting to keep trying to be at the top. It's easier just to be mediocre and float around. 

    If you nurture your son's drive in the right way he may go on to achieve great things. Definitely don't see it as a negative. See it as a bundle of energy which if directed in the right direction can yield great results.

Reply
  • I wouldn't see this as a negative trait. In fact I was exactly the same at school. I had to be first at everything. The result? I aced my GCSEs and went to a top university. Over the years I've lost that drive. I no longer have the drive to be first. It's too exhausting to keep trying to be at the top. It's easier just to be mediocre and float around. 

    If you nurture your son's drive in the right way he may go on to achieve great things. Definitely don't see it as a negative. See it as a bundle of energy which if directed in the right direction can yield great results.

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