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Waiting for first appointment

Croissant

Hello,

I've just joined the forum and have read a few other recent threads but not explored the archives properly yet. My son is nearly 3 and has been referred to the community paediatrician. He was referred because our HV thinks he's showing autistic traits. It was picked up at his 2 year review, but it's taken a while to get the ball rolling. 

His dad is also awaiting a diagnosis. The GP referred him for a pre-screening appointment with the local Aspergers centre. The lady there said that results of his questionnaire and the interview strongly suggest that he is on the autistic spectrum. There's now a long wait for the appointment with the psychologist who is qualified to actually diagnose.

I'm finding things quite hard - one day I'm 99% convinced that my son is on the spectrum, the next I feel like I'm wasting everyone's time and it's just normal toddler behaviour and I feel like I'm being disloyal for seeking medical help.

I also don't really know what to expect from the appointment with the paediatrician - the HV said they will mostly be asking us questions about our son and our answers will probably decide whether there are further referrals or if he gets discharged. My husband doesn't think that there's anything to worry about and is quite defensive about it. He is going along with the referral to keep me happy, but I know at the start he was very upset that I wanted to pursue this. If we are giving conflicting interpretations of things, will that muddy things with the paediatrician or are they used to this? 
Does anyone who has been through the process have any advice to offer?
Thanks!
Parents

  • hi croissant,

                      first of all i want to say i completley understand, i have been through  diagnosis with 2 children and currently have 2 under assesment. i too have been absolutley convinced one minute and not the next,  im guessing also that some of this comes from not really wanting to label your child, its really hard as a parent not to feel guilty, thats what we do we beet ourselves up and blame ourselves its quite normal but thats the case with everything regarding the kids isnt it. when my first child was diagnosed me and my then husband didnt see eye to eye on the issue either, this can be very difficult and im guessing adds to your doubt about the entire situation. I really wouldnt worry too much about the proffesional side of things these people are really very good at what they do and no doubt come across this situation a lot. My experience is yes they do speak to you as parents but a really big part is their own observation of your child and they are very familiar with all the various traits and behaviours, if your child is not on the spectrum then they wont say he is. the entire process  may take a while though as they like to be absolutley sure and rightly so. if your child is on the spectrum a diagnosis can ( and i use the word can because this isnt always the case) open doors to the right support for him and your family. It may help your child understand why he sees things a little differently as he gets older rather than wondering why things are different for him. most importantly the diagnosis dosnt  mean there is somthing wrong with him there isnt he just experiences things differently to us, it dosnt change your child hell still be the same little boy you adore now.

    xx

     

     

Reply

  • hi croissant,

                      first of all i want to say i completley understand, i have been through  diagnosis with 2 children and currently have 2 under assesment. i too have been absolutley convinced one minute and not the next,  im guessing also that some of this comes from not really wanting to label your child, its really hard as a parent not to feel guilty, thats what we do we beet ourselves up and blame ourselves its quite normal but thats the case with everything regarding the kids isnt it. when my first child was diagnosed me and my then husband didnt see eye to eye on the issue either, this can be very difficult and im guessing adds to your doubt about the entire situation. I really wouldnt worry too much about the proffesional side of things these people are really very good at what they do and no doubt come across this situation a lot. My experience is yes they do speak to you as parents but a really big part is their own observation of your child and they are very familiar with all the various traits and behaviours, if your child is not on the spectrum then they wont say he is. the entire process  may take a while though as they like to be absolutley sure and rightly so. if your child is on the spectrum a diagnosis can ( and i use the word can because this isnt always the case) open doors to the right support for him and your family. It may help your child understand why he sees things a little differently as he gets older rather than wondering why things are different for him. most importantly the diagnosis dosnt  mean there is somthing wrong with him there isnt he just experiences things differently to us, it dosnt change your child hell still be the same little boy you adore now.

    xx

     

     

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