• Replies 18 replies
  • Subscribers 65 subscribers
  • Views 5087 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

is this it for the rest of our lives?????

mummy of 3

Hi all our son was diagnoised last year at the age of 6 with ASD after fighting for nearly 4 years for help. He went through a stage of being aggressive towards me physically around 4 years old after 6 or so months it gradually stopped unfortunatley now the aggression has come back ten fold and hes now 8 and nearly as tall as me. I cant control him when hes aggressive towards me as i just dont have the strength. His temper is out of control he gets angry over everything and then he starts thrwoing things at me or running at me to hurt me. We have a 4 yr daughter and 11 month old baby son and he is so aggressive towards his sister ive had to explain to the school the marks on her body because of him. We have no support from anywhere.No family who is willing to get involved they all just think hes a naughty child and we have no professionals who want to help we have called so many people but we just get told " your doing fine just carry on" or "the goverment cutbacks mean we cant help you". Im at my witts end im crying all day everyday im scared of my own son and im scared for our daughters safety around him. My husband works 50 hours a week and he tries his best to help but hes finding it hard watching me struggle and being upset all the time. Ive had to give up work to be at home for our son but im missing work as it was my 5 mins of being me just me nobody else yeah i know that sounds selfish but its how i feel. Is this really how its going to be for the rest of our lives?? Ive always tried to see the positive side of the diagnosis but now all i see is the negative and no light at the end of the tunnel sorry to go on i have no where else to turn xx

Parents

  • hi mum of 3. as you know,  you're being let down by the services who are supposed to help you. Yes, cuts to local government + the nhs are severe but they shd still find somehow/someway to help.  I am shocked that all the people you must have approached have been so unhelpful.  If you haven't, ring the nas helpline for advice.  I understand that sometimes you get an ansaphone but that they will ring you back.  Information/knowledge is power.     Also you need to keep on at the services to get what you need, or at least some of what you need.  It's so difficult when you're at a low ebb, having to keep on fighting, but it's the only course of action.  How is your son doing at school?  As others have sd, there may be things upsetting him that you're not aware of.  My son, now an adult, dislikes anyone interrupting his time with someone else.  He makes it plain, verbally.  It may be that what he sees as his routine is being disrupted + that may make him upset, or he cd be sensitive to noise, touch, clothing, etc.  You can end up like a detective trying to pin any issues down.  I wd definitely up the temperature to boiling point with all those you've been let down by, as it's obvious you need support.   And no, no, no, you're not being selfish by missing your job.  You just need your life + your family's life back in balance.  That's not a lot to ask for.  Getting support from social services + education when my son was small helped massively.  That's what's missing, as you know.  Also, just a thought, you can request a carer's plan via social services.  In our area a charitable agency is contracted to do it.  That cd also help.  I wish you all the luck in the world.

Reply

  • hi mum of 3. as you know,  you're being let down by the services who are supposed to help you. Yes, cuts to local government + the nhs are severe but they shd still find somehow/someway to help.  I am shocked that all the people you must have approached have been so unhelpful.  If you haven't, ring the nas helpline for advice.  I understand that sometimes you get an ansaphone but that they will ring you back.  Information/knowledge is power.     Also you need to keep on at the services to get what you need, or at least some of what you need.  It's so difficult when you're at a low ebb, having to keep on fighting, but it's the only course of action.  How is your son doing at school?  As others have sd, there may be things upsetting him that you're not aware of.  My son, now an adult, dislikes anyone interrupting his time with someone else.  He makes it plain, verbally.  It may be that what he sees as his routine is being disrupted + that may make him upset, or he cd be sensitive to noise, touch, clothing, etc.  You can end up like a detective trying to pin any issues down.  I wd definitely up the temperature to boiling point with all those you've been let down by, as it's obvious you need support.   And no, no, no, you're not being selfish by missing your job.  You just need your life + your family's life back in balance.  That's not a lot to ask for.  Getting support from social services + education when my son was small helped massively.  That's what's missing, as you know.  Also, just a thought, you can request a carer's plan via social services.  In our area a charitable agency is contracted to do it.  That cd also help.  I wish you all the luck in the world.

Children
No Data