Our 11yo Son, diagnosed ASD, has always been talkative.
He can talk about anything that happens to be on his mind, to the point where it becomes draining to listen to him (which I feel horrible for saying by the way). If he gets onto one of his favourite subjects it can be very difficult to bring his lectures to an end.
At home, this hasn't been an issue; we're used to him and his ways.
At school, this hasn't been an issue. Until now. His classmates, they have all been in the same class for the past 6 years, know him and on the whole can deal with his ways. Lately though, our Son is saying that people in his class are telling him to shut up, or that they're not interested in what he has to say; and he's finding this difficult to deal with.
It goes without saying, that our Son doesn't pick up on social cues telling him that people are bored and so they resort to being blunt with him. Does anyone have any suggestions of how we can best help our Son with this, as it is a problem that he'll need to address especially as he'll be starting high school soon.
We can't help think that we should have addressed this sooner, but we never saw it as a problem until now. We don't want to stop his talking, despite my moaning, it is a joy to hear him wax lyrical about his topic of the moment; but we can understand how other people would find him tedious and a bit of a know-all. We just want to help him to understand when it's time to stop, if that makes sense?
I'm 46 and wait for the "shut up!" to happen. Even when I know myself I am rambling, talking way too fast, off topic, etc... I didn't do that as a child as it was beaten out of me - physically & mentally. So I guess there is a line somewhere between him wanting to be "normal" or be himself. As he gets older he may well pick up on these social queues (but don't hold your breath!) or he may well have a close group of friends he trusts when they say "SHUT UP!!" knowing they aren't being mean and they really are being friends.
Not much in the way of advice there I'm afraid - just some personal experiences :)
I talk the hind leg off a donkey, always done it, frequently off-topic - especially don't notice if the convo has moved on whilst I was thinking about something. Mind you, I think I keep going because no-one really engages. I converse quite sensibly when other people talk about stuff that interests them too.
One of my daughters is like this! She is 7 and It is constant even in her sleep! She literally does not know how to shut up, she is neurotypical and does pick up on the social cues to shush but chooses to ignore them! It really gets to her 8 year old sister who we think is asd she has major problems sorting sounds and gets upset when there is more than one noise going on at once so makes our house fun!
Hiya The Analog Kid,
You might like to have a look at the behaviour and strategies section on the NAS website. It’s full of information and ideas that may find helpful. Here’s a link to it.
Hope this helps,