How to get a asd diagnosis referral. Please help!

To cut a long story short (ish) we FINALLY got our now 10 yr old diagnosed as asd last year at the Evelina in London, while we were at the appointment the consultant asked about his siblings and said our 8 yr olds symptoms sounded worse and that he really needs to be diagnosed too to get the support he needs. This time was extremely stressful as my mum was seriously ill in hospital. A dr at the hospital reported me to the ward matron for swearing at him despite it being my mother. This matron then reported me to social services as my children were not in school (we home educate) thankfully social services took this as a malicious complaint and didn’t take it any further. When mum recovered I took my 8 year old to the gp to ask for him to be referred for diagnosis. She had clearly already read the social services report and said all of his problems were clearly caused by the ‘family issues’ despite me trying to explain numerous times what had actually happened and that ss had closed the case. She eventually agreed to do a referral and despite me clearly stating I did not want our local hospital due to these issues (and that they said my eldest was not asd previously) we received an appointment for another hospital in March but a few days ago I received a form for our local hospital so I called and said we were being seen elsewhere. I’ve since found out the other hospital has decided the referral is not appropriate so they have cancelled his appointment. I don’t know where else to go.