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Change of interests

Cupcake

Hello. My son who is now 7 used to go to lots of clubs. When the new school year started in September he said he did not want to go to them anymore. I agreed to have a break from them. 

He is also having a few issues with other children at school. He has one close friend but gets a bit bored or the friend wants to play with someone else. When he tries to play with other children he doesn't get their games or they tell him he cannot play with them.

The school say he is very happy. But at home he does not have so much interest in anything like he used to before. He can be quite rude to me and tells me to shut up if I talk about school. He is good at masking his feelings. He doesn't like upsetting people. 

I keep asking myself:

1. Is this the autism?

2. Is this a self-confidence/ mental health problem? 

3. My parenting? 

Please does anyone have any advice? Many thanks 

  • in reply to NAS39248

    Thank you. Jake does have a diagnosis of autism.  You've described Jake perfectly.  He goes to breakfast club. There was a boy he had made friends with but all of a sudden he does not want to know Jake. Everyday he will say hello and this other boy will tell Jake to go away. I can see Jake holding back the tears but he just finds something else to do. I feel terrible.  Then in the evening he can be so mean to me. I talk it through with Jake and find things to do which makes him happy but it is effecting his confidence. 

    I hope you get the support you need for your daughter.  

    Thanks again for your reply x

  • Hi

    My daughter has just turned 8 and she has exactly this problem at school! She doesn't understand their games so tries to turn it back to what she wants and when that doesn't work she spends the whole lunchtime walking round on her own, she also takes it as they don't want to play with her as they won't do what she wants. But when teachers or staff ask if she's OK all she says is I'm fine however she literally explodes about it at home. 

    She spends all day masking and the emotional toll this takes on her is dramatic it's heartbreaking to see her isolating herself (I'm there 3 lunchtimes a week) so I actually witness it.

    She is undiagnosed (trying to get her assessed ) but she also has other issues such as anxiety sleep problems and sensory issues and a restricted diet we have no doubt she has asd I'm not saying your son does but socially his behaviour is very familiar just wanted to let you know your not alone! 

    Try some of the online tests available see how he scores and if it gives an indication he might be seek advice from gp, start keeping behaviour logs they can help identify any patterns to his behaviour 

    Good luck