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My 12 year daughter referred for assessment

NAS50820

hi all, I’m new to this group and I joined it as my 12 year old daughter is struggling with building friendships in y8 girls’ school. She started y7 and made friends but it all started to go wrong after Christmas and ended up being bullied by some of her peers at the end of y7.

she hasn’t been able to make any friends since and the school has helped with addressing the bullying which I believe has stopped. However my daughter’s confidence hasn’t improved and the school carried and initial assessment which highlighted some communication difficulties and now has referred her for a formal assessment - which I believe will take up to a year’s wait.

my questions to you are:  do I go the private route for an assessment? And also how can the school help her i the meantime? They have offered her a social skills group once a week and she seems to be enjoying this. What else can I do to support her?

my daughter didn’t have any obvious difficulties in primary school, she didn’t have any close friendships but she was in a lovely class and school where everyone was very friendly.

She has particular food likes, doesn’t like extremely noisy places but tolerated them, gets affected by strong smells - now everything seems to be falling into place.

any advice will be greatly appreciated thank you!

Parents

  • Hi 

    I’m a mother of a yr8 boy who has ASD and have only just had his diagnosis afte 18mths of waiting. My only advice about assessment is too ask your local authority if they would recognise the diagnosis if you went private, some authorities will not recognise it officially.

    As for the friendship issue have you tried focusing on her special interests and finding activities out of school where she can mix with like minded individuals, this worked well for my son and helped build his self esteem. 

    Just a thought hope it helps. 

  • in reply to NAS9694

    Thank you for your reply and advice, yes, will Look into recognised assessments only. sorry you had to wait 18 months for an assessment- have you discussed his diagnosis with him (I’m asking as I don’t know how to broach the subject with my daughter).

    regarding other interests my daughter does drama out of school and will look into other activities such as a cycling club. I agree I should encourage more out of school activities  that she enjoys - thanks for the tips!

  • in reply to NAS50820

    Hi

    We have always been very oopen with him and have always told him that we want to find ways to support him and make life easier for him. Unfortunately it’s been a very long journey which we started when he was 10 and only really came about when he his stress and anxiety brought on mental health issues. Because we persevered in trying to find him help we have had to go through many assessments and discussions and he has had to re tell his story on many occasions as we’ve worked our way through the various NHS & local authorities! 

    Thanfully he is much better now and gets regular CAMHS support and has an ECHP at school which helps  him access support. 

    Its  all a journey but you’ll get there in the end, they are definitely worth the effort. 

    Good luck x

Reply
  • in reply to NAS50820

    Hi

    We have always been very oopen with him and have always told him that we want to find ways to support him and make life easier for him. Unfortunately it’s been a very long journey which we started when he was 10 and only really came about when he his stress and anxiety brought on mental health issues. Because we persevered in trying to find him help we have had to go through many assessments and discussions and he has had to re tell his story on many occasions as we’ve worked our way through the various NHS & local authorities! 

    Thanfully he is much better now and gets regular CAMHS support and has an ECHP at school which helps  him access support. 

    Its  all a journey but you’ll get there in the end, they are definitely worth the effort. 

    Good luck x

Children
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