Leeds CAMHS - Autism Diagnosis - Mandatory parenting classes!!!

I can think of two things:

1.  (This is probably controversial) - just go with it.  It's only 8 weeks, which in the context of four score years and ten is not really a huge amount of time.  If it's free training, then why not?  You might just learn something useful - who knows?  More usefully, it's likely you'll meet other people in a similar situation and I find knowing I'm not alone helps, plus it might turn out to be some useful "networking" (I hate that term!).  Then once you've done it, if there's still a problem, you can say, I did what you suggested, I found X, Y, Z to be useful ideas and I've tried to incorporate those ideas and they've helped a bit, but we're still having problems, what's next?  At least you've ticked that particular box, tried to show you learned something from it, and now you're ready for the next step.

2.  I don't know who you're dealing with, but if this is early in the process, then it's probably someone administrative/junior.  I wouldn't denigrate those people - they're essential and everyone has to start somewhere.  What you're looking for however is an "escalation" to "next level support."  Before they can do that, there are probably things they need to tick off before "next level" will even consider accepting an escalation.  So what you need to do is be nice to these people, find out what they need in order to "raise an escalation" that's likely to be accepted, and then work with them to get that together as quickly as you can and with as little effort on their part (because they're probably busy and snowed under) as possible.  Then it's easy for them to "escalate" and they are likely to do that as soon as they can because it gets the problem off their plate.  Depending on how many levels there are, you may need to do this several times - it's all an (essential) part of the game.

What you see as being "bureaucratic nonsense" most likely isn't.  What they are trying to do is resolve as many "easy problems" as low down the food chain as they can (where the people are cheaper, so you can afford more of them, which helps overall) and so that people with easier to deal with problems get quicker resolutions.  Working in this fashion helps to insulate the smaller number of (more expensive/rare) expert staff to only spend time on issues that really need their expertise.  That means the expert resources can deal with more of the difficult problems because they aren't having to waste time doing the human equivalent of:

* "Have you tried switching it off and on?"

* "Are you sure it's actually plugged in?"

* "No madam, that isn't the cup holder, it's the tray you're supposed to put CDs/DVDs in."

etc. etc. etc.

When I wanted my GP to give me a referral for an ASD assessment I researched the NICE guidelines, found out what sorts of things they would be looking for (AQ, EQ, life history evidencing difficulties etc.) and got all that together.  Then when I went to see my GP it was "I think I may have this, here's all the evidence, what do you think?  What's the next step?"  Her response was: "Well, you've done more work than I probably would've done so I'll refer you to the Neuropsych. people" - done and dusted in 20 minutes.  When my partner wanted to do the same thing we got the same stuff together.  See saw another of the GPs in the practice but again, instant referral.  But I had done my research, I knew what they were likely to be looking for, I'd tried to pre-empt the questions they were likely to ask, then hopefully it was as easy a decision for them as possible.

What you're really don't want to do is to be nasty, aggressive, bullying, etc. etc. etc. to these people because I can tell you that's almost certain to slow things down compared to the way I've suggested.  This is because if you've erked them, then they will use any slightest excuse to delay you or put you to the back of the queue - it's human nature.  These excuses can often be legitimate - e.g. "I'm terribly sorry, Mister Angry, but I'm afraid I'll have to post you out a new form to fill in.  It clearly says at the top of page 1 of the form in 18 point fluorescent red underlined bold italic flashing lettering that it needs to be filled out in black ink, but I'm afraid you used blue ink so it doesn't show up well enough on our scanner.."  If you have them on your side, they'd probably try and see if they could do something to avoid that by fiddling with the photocopier for 5 minutes to see if they could get get a high enough contrast copy that worked but...

If you do want to speak to someone like a manager to have your fears allayed about what's happening etc, try saying something complimentary about the person you've been dealing with, say you didn't want to take up too much of their time because you appreciate they are probably busy, and just ask about what the normal process is, can they give you a rough idea of the sort of timescales to expect, and is there anything you could possibly do to help make things quicker/easier for them?

Things are likely to take a while (it took ~18 months for our ASD assessments to come through after referral.)   There can be quite a wait without hearing which can be difficult.  I think it's fine to phone up every 3 or four months and just ask to check that you're still on the list, and to check that you haven't missed any communications or anything, and that there isn't anything that has been forgotten.  You're not looking to nag, you just want a bit of reassurance they everything is fine and that you are still on the list and that you'll hear in due course.

I can think of two things:

1.  (This is probably controversial) - just go with it.  It's only 8 weeks, which in the context of four score years and ten is not really a huge amount of time.  If it's free training, then why not?  You might just learn something useful - who knows?  More usefully, it's likely you'll meet other people in a similar situation and I find knowing I'm not alone helps, plus it might turn out to be some useful "networking" (I hate that term!).  Then once you've done it, if there's still a problem, you can say, I did what you suggested, I found X, Y, Z to be useful ideas and I've tried to incorporate those ideas and they've helped a bit, but we're still having problems, what's next?  At least you've ticked that particular box, tried to show you learned something from it, and now you're ready for the next step.

2.  I don't know who you're dealing with, but if this is early in the process, then it's probably someone administrative/junior.  I wouldn't denigrate those people - they're essential and everyone has to start somewhere.  What you're looking for however is an "escalation" to "next level support."  Before they can do that, there are probably things they need to tick off before "next level" will even consider accepting an escalation.  So what you need to do is be nice to these people, find out what they need in order to "raise an escalation" that's likely to be accepted, and then work with them to get that together as quickly as you can and with as little effort on their part (because they're probably busy and snowed under) as possible.  Then it's easy for them to "escalate" and they are likely to do that as soon as they can because it gets the problem off their plate.  Depending on how many levels there are, you may need to do this several times - it's all an (essential) part of the game.

What you see as being "bureaucratic nonsense" most likely isn't.  What they are trying to do is resolve as many "easy problems" as low down the food chain as they can (where the people are cheaper, so you can afford more of them, which helps overall) and so that people with easier to deal with problems get quicker resolutions.  Working in this fashion helps to insulate the smaller number of (more expensive/rare) expert staff to only spend time on issues that really need their expertise.  That means the expert resources can deal with more of the difficult problems because they aren't having to waste time doing the human equivalent of:

* "Have you tried switching it off and on?"

* "Are you sure it's actually plugged in?"

* "No madam, that isn't the cup holder, it's the tray you're supposed to put CDs/DVDs in."

etc. etc. etc.

When I wanted my GP to give me a referral for an ASD assessment I researched the NICE guidelines, found out what sorts of things they would be looking for (AQ, EQ, life history evidencing difficulties etc.) and got all that together.  Then when I went to see my GP it was "I think I may have this, here's all the evidence, what do you think?  What's the next step?"  Her response was: "Well, you've done more work than I probably would've done so I'll refer you to the Neuropsych. people" - done and dusted in 20 minutes.  When my partner wanted to do the same thing we got the same stuff together.  See saw another of the GPs in the practice but again, instant referral.  But I had done my research, I knew what they were likely to be looking for, I'd tried to pre-empt the questions they were likely to ask, then hopefully it was as easy a decision for them as possible.

What you're really don't want to do is to be nasty, aggressive, bullying, etc. etc. etc. to these people because I can tell you that's almost certain to slow things down compared to the way I've suggested.  This is because if you've erked them, then they will use any slightest excuse to delay you or put you to the back of the queue - it's human nature.  These excuses can often be legitimate - e.g. "I'm terribly sorry, Mister Angry, but I'm afraid I'll have to post you out a new form to fill in.  It clearly says at the top of page 1 of the form in 18 point fluorescent red underlined bold italic flashing lettering that it needs to be filled out in black ink, but I'm afraid you used blue ink so it doesn't show up well enough on our scanner.."  If you have them on your side, they'd probably try and see if they could do something to avoid that by fiddling with the photocopier for 5 minutes to see if they could get get a high enough contrast copy that worked but...

If you do want to speak to someone like a manager to have your fears allayed about what's happening etc, try saying something complimentary about the person you've been dealing with, say you didn't want to take up too much of their time because you appreciate they are probably busy, and just ask about what the normal process is, can they give you a rough idea of the sort of timescales to expect, and is there anything you could possibly do to help make things quicker/easier for them?

Things are likely to take a while (it took ~18 months for our ASD assessments to come through after referral.)   There can be quite a wait without hearing which can be difficult.  I think it's fine to phone up every 3 or four months and just ask to check that you're still on the list, and to check that you haven't missed any communications or anything, and that there isn't anything that has been forgotten.  You're not looking to nag, you just want a bit of reassurance they everything is fine and that you are still on the list and that you'll hear in due course.