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I don’t feel believed

NAS39316

My 7 year old daughter has just had her referral accepted and we are about to start the process of getting a potential diagnosis.

While we are waiting things at home are getting pretty bad, almost daily meltdowns which are lasting longer and longer. She gets very stressed and anxious and struggles to verbalise it. The problem is the school don’t see any of this, she hides it all at school and then it comes out at home. I had a meeting with her teacher today to see if we could come up with a way for my daughter to express how she’s feeling at school because often something happens at school and she holds it in all day. The teacher outright said she doesn’t believe she’s autistic and she doesn’t see a problem (she expressed as much on the forms that she had to fill in for the referral). 

I feel like the school have me down as some crazed, neurotic mother who is making it up or just a rubbish parent. I left that meeting feeing crap and not knowing how to go forward and deal with this. I can’t understand how they can outright dismiss this as a potential problem. 

Parents

  • I am sat here crying reading this because this is what is happening at our home my son is 3 nearly 4 and things are sooo bad atm. I've had 14 straight bad days with him. I've just been declined a cahms referral as they want him seen by the neuro team but now they want a school report and I know that the school won't help. I voiced my concern before he started school and they have been no help. Noah thrives in routine it's when things aren't in routine and everyday living. I just want someone to listen and tell us how to help him. I don't care about a label. Just help for us to help him. It breaks my heart watching him sooo distressed over everything. The colour on something or texture or if someone has touched it or what order it's in it terrible 

  • in reply to NAS39332

    Getting rejected is a real blow, my daughter was rejected in the summer by the child development centre as cahms had used poor phrasing in referral letter "we don't see children to exclude diagnosis"  was the response I got also that she would not be seen as no social and communication problems identified, despite her school reply that these can be limited. As I said previously our school nursing team have been fantastic she was almost as angry at the rejection as me! We have now had to go the route of putting ehp in place getting help for daughters anxiety and gathering as many reports as possible to re refer her, this is long winded and doesn't really help us immediately but at least it is something. Keep talking to school keep behaviour logs, try the help line here they will have more specific information 

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  • in reply to NAS39332

    Getting rejected is a real blow, my daughter was rejected in the summer by the child development centre as cahms had used poor phrasing in referral letter "we don't see children to exclude diagnosis"  was the response I got also that she would not be seen as no social and communication problems identified, despite her school reply that these can be limited. As I said previously our school nursing team have been fantastic she was almost as angry at the rejection as me! We have now had to go the route of putting ehp in place getting help for daughters anxiety and gathering as many reports as possible to re refer her, this is long winded and doesn't really help us immediately but at least it is something. Keep talking to school keep behaviour logs, try the help line here they will have more specific information 

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