problems between parents with ASD children

Dealing with kids without issues are challenging enough, right? But did it ever come to a point for you and your spouse - fighting and maybe separating - because of your ASD child?

Parents
  • This is very sad but common.  My husband has less patience with my son then I do. I try to step in before he gets frustrated. We also discuss strategies before hand.  We try to decide how to handle a meltdown before it happens.  Our plans don't always work or often it is just about riding it out and being firm not angry. The best thing you can do for your child ASD or not is work as a team.  Be consistant so they know what to expect. With ASD you may need to wait out a meltdown then start again. It's not easy on you two or your little one.  Try to remember that nothing between you two has changed, focus on the problem not the frustration or angry you feel.  Find articles & videos that help you understand how your child can and can't cope with issues.  This might help him and you be more understanding when the emotions are running high.  

    Side note: I just read and article today about why we should not force our children to eat.  Do some online searches and put together some ideas and when it's a good time try to have a chat about different ideas.  My husband came from an eat what your are given and I am more like let me know what you want and if I can make it I will.  I just had my boys try spinach yesterday and it actually went better then I thought.

    :-) the more difficult the challenge the more rewarding the successes.  I wish you all the best and sending some hugs of support.  

  • thanks so much for your comforting and supportive words. i believe my mum now when she said - marriage is tough little girl, you'll get the taste of your own medicine soon. now, i know. it's doubly hard since our child require special attention. i just feel that it's breaking us apart. or that our marriage isn't built strongly for us to be in this situation. i have turned myself to searching from online sources about dysfunctional family, parenting ASD kids and how to cope with your spouse. i just feel so down.

Reply
  • thanks so much for your comforting and supportive words. i believe my mum now when she said - marriage is tough little girl, you'll get the taste of your own medicine soon. now, i know. it's doubly hard since our child require special attention. i just feel that it's breaking us apart. or that our marriage isn't built strongly for us to be in this situation. i have turned myself to searching from online sources about dysfunctional family, parenting ASD kids and how to cope with your spouse. i just feel so down.

Children
  • sad to read but trying finding support around counselling or impacts on asd relationship. take your family as a whole if one person has asd all have asd as discrimination can occur to your whole family. focus on the behaviour and not the person. in regards to food find out if she likes particular food shapes or textures parenting a and child is not easy but my mum did it by herself with help from wider agencies there's always help but one rule believe nothing said and everything done helpful YouTube channel - Aspergers from the inside might help 

  • Thanks Frankie for your support.  Glad I'm in this forum.  Reading facts and experiences and conversing with you guys give me so much comfort and strength

  • I'm happy to chat any time if you need. It's a tough road and not one anyone should face alone. :-(  We need to be here for each other.  It is not easy.  Please feel free to message me any time. :-)