I'll keep this as brief as possible but any advice or anyone's experience of a similar situation would be a Godsend thanks.
I have lived on a rural property for the last 15 years as part of my partners employment and we have been very lucky. I have no neighbours and the only issues are a noisy bypass a few hundred feet to the back and the fact that we are responsible for security of the place which causes anxiety especially at nights. The main plus point though for me having Asperger's and sensitive to other people's noise is that i don't have any worries about this.
That said the employment is tenous and we know we cannot stay in the property for the rest of our lives and at some point we will have to move out. We don't have much money like a lot of people and the partly isolated detached cottage i would like to rule out neighbours intrusions doesn't look like happening anytime soon.
We have been lucky again in the fact that we have been offered a social housing property in a decent area near to my daughters school but i am very stressed out with all the uncertainty and my inexperience of living in a normal street with houses, gardens and people seemingly on top of one another. I am sociable on a minimal scale but cound't be doing with overly chatty neighbours and also i am very very sensitive to nosie such as people shouting, loud music etc. I can tolerate it for a very short while despite it causing distress but any longer and i get angry and go into meltdown which is what happened frequently before i moved into the rural property.
Before that i lived in a mid terraced house and a few doors down lived a young lad and all he did was played music and i could hear the droning bass all the time. Eventually i moved out but there a were a number of occasions where i was on the cusp of going around and beating the living daylights out of him. I loathe confrontation and i loathe violence but it got to the point where i really couldn't escape this, i couldn't handle it and i just wanted it to stop.
I know that most streets have fair minded considerate people living on them but it would just be my luck to get near someone who is inconsiderate, has parties and plays loud music all the time and i don't know how i would cope with this.
I'm only 40 but my ideal neighbours and near neighbours would be pensioners over 65! lol
It's a dilemma as i know i have to move out from a place i can largely control my environment to a place where i am a fish out of water and have NO control over my immediate environment. Similarly if i got youths hanging around it would be a nightmare. I'm the kind of person who is avoidant. I'd avoid it until i could avoid it no more and without the social and assertiveness skills to go out and confront people i meltdown and lash out and then i'd be in trouble.
I'm in a confusing place right now trying to make the best and the right decision.
I'm even trying to second guess scenarios. For example i know the house joined on next door was sold a few years ago which would maybe not see that house changing tenants all the time which would cause me stress as i wouldn't know who was moving in. However i then think to myself that at least if it WERE a council house then i could report the neighbours if they caused any issues. All ifs buts and maybes.
I really don't want to come across as ungrateful as i am fully aware of the housing crisis in this country and the fact that there are many people living near idiots causing problems and have no way of escape. I'm just telling it from the perspective of an Aspie to whom this stuff causes serious distress and looking for good news stories and any advice really.
It's the old chestnut about no money - no options i guess.
I'm really in a mess over this as it's a huge change and a huge leap of faith but do i stay where i am and stay isolated and at risk of eviction at any time or do i accept the housing offer and hope for the best?
So many thanks.
