Considering a dog for ASD Son, concerned his behaviour may frighten dog. Thoughts?

Hi - we've found black labrador puppy really saved the day in terms of supporting and calming through extreme anxiety.  This was needed when the last education placement totally broke down.

A lot of consideration went into the decision to get a puppy - as I'm a single parent full time carer for autistic daughter.  We already had a 13 year old jack russell who is wonderful but very independent not huggable. 

The puppy has been the biggest help and really changed our lives. 

Taking on a puppy is a big job, on top of everything else. An older rescue dog might be better. If you find the right one, they come ready trained, calmer and more mature. The baggage they bring with them may be far easier and quicker to resolve than training a puppy.

I'm 60 and live on my own, so am in an entirely different situation to you. My previous dog was a year old collie/springer cross who was totally out of control when he moved in, and it was a lot of hard work to help him become a wonderful companion. I was just able to handle this at the time, but I couldn't the way I've been feeling in recent years. I don't think I could take on a puppy. My current dog is a German Shepherd, who was almost 5 when she moved in. Right from the start she was very calm and gentle (most of the time!!), and settled in and adapted to her new life very quickly. The only problem I had was that she was very nervous, and I needed a supply of carpet cleaner on hand for the first couple of months. She reads people and other animals very well, and knows when to go off to a safe place, and she is also very loyal and does almost everything I ask of her. I think she'd get very worried by violent rages though, as I think most dogs would, and would need plenty of reassurance when they were over.

I'm not suggesting a GSD is the right breed for you, but just to consider an older dog may be better than a puppy. I think one of the larger intelligent breeds may be better than many of the small breeds. It's amazing how many people pick up their small dogs when I walk by with my GSD, not because they're scared of my dog, but because their small one is likely to attack! My "big fearless" GSD just runs back to me for protection if she feels threatened!

Thank you for this. Yes we'd like a Lab. I've had retrievers and cockers in the past (before the kids) they're a well rounded breed and my Son adores the look of a golden Lab. We're an active family and there will be space for the dog to find some quiet. 

My Son is currently in crisis, he's not well at all and has been out of school for months. He's being allocated a new school for Sept to meet his needs. 

Ive had to stop myself introducing a dog now even though it's desperate times! I think once school is in place and I have a CAMHS programme that will be a better time to get him his puppy. when things are calmer. 

He would qualify for an assistance dog but the waiting lists are very long and there just aren't the dogs available. 

So we'd be introducing a puppy as a family pet, we'd like the dog to bond with our Son and help calm him. 

I was just wondering if anyone had experience of how a family pet dog copes with the noise and chaos surrounding some meltdowns :)

I don't know anything apart from that there are specially trained autism dogs 'available' and I don't know whether your son would qualify etc My first step to find out more would be to ring the helpline on this website.  This means in my way of thinking the dog would manage meltdowns and violent behaviour or indeed in return the  dog may in time help him to manage his behaviour and be calmer about it. Who knows.  I would ring the helpline and ask there about it....