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Why are we not allowed to share contact details?

AspyMum

Hi,

I am new here and I am diagnosed ASD, 43 years old and have never met another ASD person.  

I find it very hard to small talk, in fact I don't...  I know I try and who knows what my face is doing while I'm trying to keep track of the stream of fluff that people like to call 'conversation' but I don't think I'm that convincing!  It would be lovely to meet others, but whilst reading a few posts on here I see that contact details are not to be shared?  Have I got that wrong?  

Confused!!   

Parents
  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hi AspyMum,

    Being prickly is practically a pre-requisite for diagnosis so I know I am prickly but it takes a lot to make me react in the forum because I expect everyone to be at least a bit maladroit. If you were a sliver tongued diplomat I would smell a rat!

    NAS can't be perfect for everybody and the main focus of their work is people who are the most disabled. It is also a charity staffed by a mixture of folk some of whom are on the spectrum so some things that they do and put on the website might not suit everyone. On balance, the website is useful, some people object to various aspects of it from time to time and we have had a very robust discussion about how the forum is moderated and I think it's fair to say that we have made ourselves heard. see http://community.autism.org.uk/discussions/general-discussions/general-chat/idea

    I agree with Cephie's comments about anonymity and the facility it gives for frank and hopefully sensible conversation. There are other places in tinternet for meeting like minded people and I guess for finding other diagnosed people. My impression is however that most people with a diagnosis who have sustained a long term friend ship or relationship didn't set out on that path by deliberately selecting someone else who was on the spectrum. I think that would frequently not end well. I have a few trusty friends who are aware of my diagnosis (the world does not need to know and the world actually doesn't cope with this information very well) but I have found that my encounters with other people on the spectrum (diagnosed or not) are always more difficult than with NT people. BTW I use NT to indicate people who are not on the spectrum but I do not use it to indicate a clone like group of people with very similar behaviour, there is as much variety in NT as there is within people on the spectrum.

    Smallprint: For the avoidance of doubt, this is all opinion and my own personal view rather than a definitive judgement! I reserve the right to apologise, contradict or correct myself as necessary whenever anyone identifies anything that I should have given more thought to.

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hi AspyMum,

    Being prickly is practically a pre-requisite for diagnosis so I know I am prickly but it takes a lot to make me react in the forum because I expect everyone to be at least a bit maladroit. If you were a sliver tongued diplomat I would smell a rat!

    NAS can't be perfect for everybody and the main focus of their work is people who are the most disabled. It is also a charity staffed by a mixture of folk some of whom are on the spectrum so some things that they do and put on the website might not suit everyone. On balance, the website is useful, some people object to various aspects of it from time to time and we have had a very robust discussion about how the forum is moderated and I think it's fair to say that we have made ourselves heard. see http://community.autism.org.uk/discussions/general-discussions/general-chat/idea

    I agree with Cephie's comments about anonymity and the facility it gives for frank and hopefully sensible conversation. There are other places in tinternet for meeting like minded people and I guess for finding other diagnosed people. My impression is however that most people with a diagnosis who have sustained a long term friend ship or relationship didn't set out on that path by deliberately selecting someone else who was on the spectrum. I think that would frequently not end well. I have a few trusty friends who are aware of my diagnosis (the world does not need to know and the world actually doesn't cope with this information very well) but I have found that my encounters with other people on the spectrum (diagnosed or not) are always more difficult than with NT people. BTW I use NT to indicate people who are not on the spectrum but I do not use it to indicate a clone like group of people with very similar behaviour, there is as much variety in NT as there is within people on the spectrum.

    Smallprint: For the avoidance of doubt, this is all opinion and my own personal view rather than a definitive judgement! I reserve the right to apologise, contradict or correct myself as necessary whenever anyone identifies anything that I should have given more thought to.

Children
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