Interacting with people

Hi Kenny. I would think you'd get about 100% yes to that, closely followed by 'however, these are my exceptions'...

I have occasional difficulties even with those who are 'closest' to me - and trying to speak to a fellow AS doesn't always end up well either. The beauty of writing is that it's easier to say what you need to say, but the down side is that we don't always read each other in the same way that the entires are written. I often struggle with an entry, examining it from all sides to see if I can read it in different ways, and I find that often yes, I can. Trying to work out which one is the right one can be a nightmare, and sometimes leads me to decide not to reply just in case I'm answering the wrong one.

'Interaction' always involves 'speech', so it isn't written down and a word or phrase can lodge in my head. Whilst the 'conversation' is 'moving along', I'm stuck with the word or phrase trying to work out what it means. People don't often want to discuss the particular thing that I'm obsessing over, and also I haven't heard anything afterwards so don't know where the conversation has gone or is going.

I have so often fallen foul of people through this. I read that NTs can 'read' each others' expressions, gestures, tone of voice etc, and that's without their using those little sayings that never make sense. I recently pointed out to someone that although I now 'get' what they mean, it took me a long time to understand 'you hit the nail on the head' because I'm not nailing anything, I prefer to use screws, and I don't often start a construction in the middle of a conversation. I was using it as an example of how easily we can misconstrue the use of such sayings.

Also, NTs are mental. They don't use logic, they don't express themselves clearly and precisely, they get very emotional over very small things, and they deliberately lie and mislead each other. When they do that to us, we can't always tell - it has sometimes taken me years to understand what someone said once.

I've been physicaly attacked more than once without any understanding of why. I've had very strange reactions to things I've said (I always try to speak truly and accurately) including all of the name-calling that we get so tired of. Untill I got my diagnosis, I just thought that there was an invisible sign on my forhead saying 'it's OK to treat me as badly as you like. Now, I'm starting to understand that it's because of our difference, but I still have very little grasp of the whys and wherefores.

So yes, interaction is difficult at best, dangerous at worst and something that I try to avoid at all costs, minimise when I can't avoid, and get very tired by in any case.

So, normal AS experience. Try to accept that it is what it is, we all have to find ways to cope with it, and for me that usually means say nothing unless you've absolutely got to, it's the safe way.

Hi Kenny. I would think you'd get about 100% yes to that, closely followed by 'however, these are my exceptions'...

I have occasional difficulties even with those who are 'closest' to me - and trying to speak to a fellow AS doesn't always end up well either. The beauty of writing is that it's easier to say what you need to say, but the down side is that we don't always read each other in the same way that the entires are written. I often struggle with an entry, examining it from all sides to see if I can read it in different ways, and I find that often yes, I can. Trying to work out which one is the right one can be a nightmare, and sometimes leads me to decide not to reply just in case I'm answering the wrong one.

'Interaction' always involves 'speech', so it isn't written down and a word or phrase can lodge in my head. Whilst the 'conversation' is 'moving along', I'm stuck with the word or phrase trying to work out what it means. People don't often want to discuss the particular thing that I'm obsessing over, and also I haven't heard anything afterwards so don't know where the conversation has gone or is going.

I have so often fallen foul of people through this. I read that NTs can 'read' each others' expressions, gestures, tone of voice etc, and that's without their using those little sayings that never make sense. I recently pointed out to someone that although I now 'get' what they mean, it took me a long time to understand 'you hit the nail on the head' because I'm not nailing anything, I prefer to use screws, and I don't often start a construction in the middle of a conversation. I was using it as an example of how easily we can misconstrue the use of such sayings.

Also, NTs are mental. They don't use logic, they don't express themselves clearly and precisely, they get very emotional over very small things, and they deliberately lie and mislead each other. When they do that to us, we can't always tell - it has sometimes taken me years to understand what someone said once.

I've been physicaly attacked more than once without any understanding of why. I've had very strange reactions to things I've said (I always try to speak truly and accurately) including all of the name-calling that we get so tired of. Untill I got my diagnosis, I just thought that there was an invisible sign on my forhead saying 'it's OK to treat me as badly as you like. Now, I'm starting to understand that it's because of our difference, but I still have very little grasp of the whys and wherefores.

So yes, interaction is difficult at best, dangerous at worst and something that I try to avoid at all costs, minimise when I can't avoid, and get very tired by in any case.

So, normal AS experience. Try to accept that it is what it is, we all have to find ways to cope with it, and for me that usually means say nothing unless you've absolutely got to, it's the safe way.