Help please anyone

Hi I have been looking round this wonderful site for 2 days now and have just joined I am sorry to make this my first post but I really need some advise.

My Son Thomas is 3 and for about a year now we have noticed something wrong with his Speach so we have got him under S.A.L.T and had his ears tested his hearing is fine.

But just of late the last few months he seems to have gone backwards which his S.A.L.T agreed with me on yesterday. To tell you some of the stuff that's going on he likes to smeer his poo all over my walls and the floor I have found him a few times now and he has face painted his whole body in poo. Now I am pretty sure that it should make him feel sick but he thinks it's a great game. He is just as bad with his wee he wont wear a nappy and he wees everywhere.

I took him to my friends the other day and he weeded all over her hall wall. He Dose not know how to play with other children it's like he trys but he dose not understand how to join in and then he gets agressive and hits and kicks he has been know to throw toys and chairs at other children to.

He freaks if things are not done at a certain time everything has to been the same everyday.

He gets aggressive with me and his little sister for no reason. And it's like he goes onto hyper drive running about jumping on things its like he is sped up.

When people touch him he says aww he hates wearing clothes and gets quite upset like they are hurting and he has to get them off. He also flaps his arms and shakes when things become to much. I hate taking him out as he has no fear he will run into the road and passing cars.

I have a family member who is A S.A.L.T and she came up to me and a family get together and said she is very worried about him and she feels something is not right. Then I have heard a friend and a friend who looks after kids with asd has said that she is worried something is not right. The S.A.L.T I saw yesterday said this was out of her area. I am so worried and confused I dont have a clue what is going on I don't know how best to look after my son I am so so tierd as he is such hard work and I am trying to look after him and his sister and I have to be up everyday at 5am for work. And everyone seems to be asking me things and noone is telling my anything and I so need to know what's going on. I have an app with another DR the day before x mass eve but that's so long away

Parents

Nats over 14 years ago

Hi Poohbear
It sounds like you have been having a tough time of it. You must be exhausted. Although I am no expert, a parent of an Aspergers boy 9, it does sound like your child is exhibiting autistic traits.
Whilst you are waiting to see the Doctor you could spend some time reading books on Autism. This will help you too understand the condition better and also to understand his behaviour.
I don't have any answers on the smearing, hopefully another parent will come along to help with that one. Regards the freaking out if things are not the same everyday, i would say that he does this because life is confusing and stressfull for him, he needs the structure and routine so he can cope. Try to keep a very strict routine for him, meal times, bed times, playing times. Also give him lots of notice if you are going to be going anywhere like park, shops, friends. If your creative make a schedule for him that is visual. If you need help with this let me know. This kind of thing is usefull for all children so it can't do any harm.
Autistic people have problems with their senses. So perhaps your son feels things much more strongly than you or I? My son doesn't like it when i wash his bedding as the cover is all stiff (according to him) and he'll choose to wear clothes he's worn for days rather than freshly washed and ironed ones. I know parents who buy second hand clothes because the new clothes are just not worn enough.
Try giving your son toys that are for children much younger ages. If he can't play with other children properly then he might be happier with a box of baby toys. Give him a place he can hide, a den or something. With his sister, give him a laminated orange card and explain to him that when his sister is annoying him or he feels he is going to hurt her that he is too give her the orange card instead. Explain to his sister tat when she is given the card she must immediately come to you. This takes a bit of practice and drilling in but is a good tactic when its in place.
I have other tips but don't want to bombard you.
Take care of your self and let me know how things go
xx

Reply

Nats over 14 years ago

Hi Poohbear
It sounds like you have been having a tough time of it. You must be exhausted. Although I am no expert, a parent of an Aspergers boy 9, it does sound like your child is exhibiting autistic traits.
Whilst you are waiting to see the Doctor you could spend some time reading books on Autism. This will help you too understand the condition better and also to understand his behaviour.
I don't have any answers on the smearing, hopefully another parent will come along to help with that one. Regards the freaking out if things are not the same everyday, i would say that he does this because life is confusing and stressfull for him, he needs the structure and routine so he can cope. Try to keep a very strict routine for him, meal times, bed times, playing times. Also give him lots of notice if you are going to be going anywhere like park, shops, friends. If your creative make a schedule for him that is visual. If you need help with this let me know. This kind of thing is usefull for all children so it can't do any harm.
Autistic people have problems with their senses. So perhaps your son feels things much more strongly than you or I? My son doesn't like it when i wash his bedding as the cover is all stiff (according to him) and he'll choose to wear clothes he's worn for days rather than freshly washed and ironed ones. I know parents who buy second hand clothes because the new clothes are just not worn enough.
Try giving your son toys that are for children much younger ages. If he can't play with other children properly then he might be happier with a box of baby toys. Give him a place he can hide, a den or something. With his sister, give him a laminated orange card and explain to him that when his sister is annoying him or he feels he is going to hurt her that he is too give her the orange card instead. Explain to his sister tat when she is given the card she must immediately come to you. This takes a bit of practice and drilling in but is a good tactic when its in place.
I have other tips but don't want to bombard you.
Take care of your self and let me know how things go
xx

Children

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