Hi
I have a son who is 18 with Aspergers.
I met my current partner 18 months ago and he has been a very intregal part of our lives and I want him to continue to be so.
The problem I have is getting him to understand my son.
They do get on well for the most part.
I am well aware that my son is a teenager and has traits like all teenagers; lazy, untidy, unwilling to listen.........(sorry for those of you who are not like this!!)
Me and his dad split up when he was 2. Since then he has lived with us both, a week about turn (one week on, one week off). His behaviour at school was always bad, due to his condition, due to the inability of the school etc etc. His behaviour at his grandparents house - perfect. His behaviour at his Dad's - perfect. With me however it was different and continues to be. I understand that this is normal and (if I am correct) depends upon the individual and how they feel in different environments.
He attended a boarding school from the age of 11 to 16 which has had a dramatic effect on his behaviour, confidence and personality. All in all a good choice, albeit a hard one.
Since his return from boarding school he has on the whole been fine. He is very capable. Is training to be a mechanic and wants to find part time work which is proving difficult. People who meet him don't know he has Aspergers. We have had an incident recently that resulted in holes in my wall and a broken TV. He wouldn't have done this at his Dad's house.
I have asked him why and got the usual response of I don't know.
My partner cannot understand why he would do this at my house but not anywhere else.
Is there anyone out there that can explain why behaviours differ in different surroundings with different people in order that I can relay back.
Also, for anyone who has had a new person introduced into their lives, ie a potential step parent, how have you dealt with the changes. I would like to hear comments from my son's point of view.
Thank you for reading and I look forward to all of your helpful comments.
