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I have a friend who cares for Autistic Adults, but I feel I need to report him

whistleblow3r

Im not sure if this is the right place to post but I need some advice. 

I have a friend who works with young adults and adults who suffer with Autism and Behaviour Difficulties. He is a care worker/stand in manager who works in a small care home looking after about six of these adults. 

Now, don't get me wrong I feel he is a good person and good at his job, but I so happen to know he is a recreational drug user and he also goes to work hungover most days. I went to stay with him a month or so ago as we was hanging out. He had work the next day but he was smoking weed and drinking like he was on holiday. Im not just talking one or two spliffs but it was rolling one after the other. I was shocked by the amount of drug taking. The next day he wasn't at work until the afternoon but he had already smoked three joints in the morning, then goodness knows how many after I had left. I also happen to know on his days off he sometimes dabbles with cocaine. On top of drinking every night. 

So as you can see its a bit of a problem! I don't know if I should report him in an attempt to straighten up and fly right (and not under the influence of drugs and drink). But I feel that if I was a parent or guardian of someone who has Autism if I would NOT be comfortable knowing that someone with such a lifestyle was a caretaker of that person. Im not sure how it effects his judgements and decision making but I feel that it is not on. 

Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you.

  • You say he is good at his job. So what is the problem? Has it not occurred to you that his relaxed attitude might help him empathise with his clients?

    God forbid they end up with a po-faced jobsworth...

  • There are lots of drugs. Alcohol is seriously harmful, but it's taxed, so it's legal. Other drugs aren't, but it doesn't stop their supply and use, and that's because people like and want to use them. So for anyone - pay your money and choose your poison...

    I support any adult's right to make their own choice, and as far as I can tell, there is no real cause for concern here at all. Also, I am at a loss to explain why, having enjoyed his hospitality, you would consider doin him harm. However, as with anyone else, you make your own choices and must live with your own conscience afterwards.

    I read a story only this week from Wales, concerning a Prison Officer who was reported by a 'colleague' as having gone out with friends whilst she was off work with stress. She was sacked, and her career was ruined, and so was her life - the unfairness was instrumental in her suicide. A tribumal later ruled, unequivocably, that her sacking was grossly infair.

    I hope that rat of a 'colleague' finds it hard to sleep at night, and I hope that what keeps them awake is how ashamed of theirselves they feel. I hold that person responsible for the death of an innocent person. I can only speculate as to the petty minded person they are - clearly an NT.

    Leave well alone - if his bosses judge his work fit, and the Residents like him, there's more harm than good in causing trouble for him

    No-one likes a grass, that's what I think. You're even considering this, yet you dare to call yourself this person's friend? Got a mirror?

  • I'm sure you didn't mean to be rude but we don't 'suffer' with autism any more than you 'suffer' with being neurotypical. We are autistic.

    If you think this man is good at his job and no complaints have been made about his work, then why do you want to report him? If you did and he were replaced, his removal would have a bad effect on some of the autistic people he supports who place great value on routine and on everything staying the same.

    You don't seem to have discussed your feelings about his drug use with him. As he was kind enough to have you to stay in his house don't you think you should at least do that before doing something that could cost him a job he loves?

    I'm sure his work is scrutinised by his managers who would take action if it gave cause for concern. If his drug taking doesn't affect his work then its none of your beeswax.

  • Sorry to hear you are in such a difficult situation. It's appalling that someone new who's job it is to provide safety and care to those who need it would be so carelesss but at the same time we don't know what he may be going through.

    My suggestion would be to talk to him about his behaviour and if he has no remorse and makes no effort to change you must report him. But you never know, hs might just need a kick up the backside to remind him of his commitments and responsibilities.

    Good Luck