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Toddler diagnosed

Boz 89

Hello, my three year old is currently in the MAAT process with a probable diagnosis of Autistic Spectrum Disorder. He says only three words, has never said 'mummy' or 'daddy' but everything is a 'clock' or a 'car' at the moment! His obsessions. Makes good eye contact and responds to name. Very sociable with adults but no interest in other children and can get very stressed if he sees any playing with cars or vehicles. Loves cuddles and kisses but all on his terms. Although I'll usually get one if I ask maybe 2 or 3 times! Extremely picky eater. Will only eat Raisins, bananas, crackers, yoghurts and Cheerios for breakfast and lunch. His evening 'meal' will be a baby jar. And even then it's usually only 2 flavours.

Has several meltdowns a day usually when we have to leave a certain place ie the park or when we get out of the car. Or just when we can't make him understand something in general. Hates having his hair cut, nails trimmed and teeth brushed but will eventuallu comply if we turn it into a game, or if he's asleep ha! Public outings and trips can be difficult and often result in us returning home early after a meltdown. Lots of parks and wide open spaces are good for him as he loves to explore. Hates being restricted to one area so this makes going out for a meal nigh on impossible. still have to use his buggy as he will either run off in the wrong direction or will just stubbornly stay put on the ground til I carry him.

 Really hard to reason with him with the lack of speech and understanding. He's a happy boy in general though. Laughs and interacts with me and his dad all day, especially at home. have to limit his time playing with cars or watching television as he will become transfixed. My main worries are for his nutrition as he is so picky and some days won't hardly eat at all and for his speech and language. He mainly babbles and uses his few words within the babbling. Do all autistic children speak eventually and eat better? Also going to have issues potty training him. HV has advised not to start yet as he wont understand it but I think he'll need to start soon and want him out of nappies

Doc concluded that he is very high up on the spectrum at the moment but could move down when the speech comes. Was that the case for any of you parents with older children? Sorry if this post is too long! Still coming to terms with it all. Im glad things are moving in the right direction though and can now start preparing for the future, even if it's a different future to the one id envisioned. Just want to stay positive and be the best mummy I can be to my little man. Any answers to these questions or advice would be highly appreciated, thankhs for reading :)

  •  Hi.

     My 3 year old is same. HE was diagnosed with ASD 5month ago. he gets lots of meltdowns in public places .i am struggling with his nappy traning at the moment. he is very visual , can spend ages infront of tv /phone/laptop. We used phone as bribe for nappy training and it did went well now he is keen to sit but not without phone. i dont think its going to fade away. we have used pecs system and got sucess from 2 words to 40 words now that he can repeat. and can actually say 10 words with any prompting.

    My concern is that we have moved to  milton keyenes and it will take another4 months to get first assessment appointment with nhs  . Can you please share more information about ABA.cost /where to find therapist / goals that can be achieved etc ?  I dont know where to start from?

     Many thanks

  • My son is 4 at Christmas and is similar to what you are explaining However my son is completely non verbal and has no hand gestures at all. We had a diagnosis at age 2 and now he is classed as severe autism and there has Been no improvement since age 2 to now. he is still in nappies and as he can't communicate with us it's impossible to even think about potty changing him. My son also hates having hair cut and nails cut and has melt downs for ages once it's done. We have received his EHCP so he could be going to a special needs nursery in November if all goes according to plan. I have been told that they have improve and the speech can come but not all people with autism speak so depends on the individual. The fact your son says a few words though is very positive. We recently when on a caravan holiday for the weekend and ended up leaving early as my son couldn't handle it so understand when you say you have left places we regualrly leave Places early as things get too much for my son. just thought I would share my experience And there is hope they can improve but not cured. 

  • You could almost be describing my 2.5 half year old boy there! We're starting ABA therapy this Tuesday coming and high hopes of a positive outcome. 

    Do you find that if put your little one in the the play area of the park, he'll play for 5 mins and then want out? And a meltdown ensues if not allowed? If so, our ABA guy gave a trick that has already worked for us. We cut some sweets into tiny bits and used it to lure our boy away from the gate and back to the slide. He got the reward for coming over and another for using the slide. Then he forgot about getting out for longer than usual.

    Obviously you cannot bribe your child with sweets forever, but you can reinforce with praise and gradually fade out the sweets.

    Regarding going out for meals, we've resorted to allowing him to watch a cartoon on the Ipad if needed. Not ideal, but you can't never get out yourselves. We hope to fade this out over time.