Hello, have just joined this site in the hope that someone will be able to help me?
I feel totally out of my depth and so lost with what is happening and what I should be doing.
I have a 9 year old son who got on well at nursery, was toilet trained by the age of 2 and was always a very happy toddler. He started school well and was described as very caring child.
In the last few years, I have watched him fall further and further behind the rest of his class. I don't feel I could do much more with him at home, we read together nearly every night, I practice his spellings and handwriting with him and always spend a lot of time working on his homework with him. I am confident that he has dyslexia and have been pushing the school to make an assessment for a while. I am also convinced that there is something more going on with him. Having done a bit of my own research and reading, I came across ADHD which seemed to describe him to a t apart from the fact he is not majorly hyperactive. I went to my GP and got referred to CAMHS with our first few appointments in May/June 2011. The Educational Psychologist we saw was lovely and I was really confident in her. She referred us to the Family Therapy unit as she believed that some of the behaviour my son displayed may have been due to issues with his dad (we separated when my son was 1, he then re-married and moved to his wifes hometown in Hereford. They now have 2 daughters and see my son every 3rd week or so, he often lets my son down and there have been a few incidents which have upset him too). The Ed Psych thinks that dealing with these issues and my son's place in our family may help with some of the behaviours (I am now married and have 2 daughters, my son recently started calling my husband 'dad' after 7 years).
We finally got our appointment through after 4 months of waiting and are seeing the family therapy unit next Monday.
Last week we had another meeting with a new Ed Psych who has taken over from the lady we had in May. I am certainly not impressed with him. He said he could totally rule out autism because he didn't show any signs at the age of 2 or 3 and that it was less likely that he has ADHD as he is able to concentrate on a film or video game when he is interested. This contradicts everything I have been reading recently and have now come across asburgers, tourettes, OCD and different types of autism and am so confused because he seems to have behaviours and characteristics from so many of them.
In the mean time my son's behaviour at school has been deteriorating and I was called into school today because of his lack of respect, shouting out whilst on the carpet and throwing pencils. The teacher said that when she was talking to him, he just looked blank as if he didn't care or understand. This isn't the first incident at school recently.
Is anyone able to help me work out what condition/s he may have? I know a lot of people don’t think diagnose is important (including the second Ed Psych I saw) but I think it is important as without it, my son won’t get the help and support he desperately needs.
· He shouts and gets loud at inappropriate times (in class/when excited)
· He cannot stop himself touching things; he has to be doing something with his hand whether he is picking something up, moving something, twisting his jumper etc.
· He is obsessed with his trousers touching the floor and will refuse to wear trousers if he thinks they are too long.
· At night I have to flatten his duvet cover, close his wardrobe door, open his room door as wide as possible and then he places his teddy behind his head, whilst I press play on his CD player with the same CD is has listened to every night for the past 5 years.
· He has no idea of tact and tells private conversations or comments that have been made within his ear shot.
· Makes loud noises whenever possible whether it be clapping, stamping, shouting or clicking.
· He is scared of the dark and will put lights on in every room in the middle of the day. I still have issues getting him to go upstairs to get something on his own at any time of day.
· He lies quite a lot, bends the truth and says that people have said things, almost as if he thinks that’s what you want to hear. He was also caught stealing at school recently but didn’t seem to see that it was still wrong if it wasn’t attended.
· He has difficulty following instructions and certainly can’t do more than one or two at any one time.
· He doesn’t really seem to get humour or sarcasm and often gets quite upset because he thinks he is being had a go at.
· He has very low self esteem, thinks everything is his fault, thinks everyone is talking about him if you try and have a conversation out of his ear shot.
· He loves tractors/cars... anything motor related really and will sit for ages with anything to do with this subject.
· He loses concentration very easily, you could be talking to him and a bird will fly by which he will watch, totally unaware he was meant to be listening to something else.
· Academically, he is at least 2 years behind at the moment but is interested in Science.
· He gets bored very easily, not just in school but in external clubs, he finds it hard to keep interested in anything.
· He has an excellent and detailed long term memory to the point of amazement but short term is awful, he cannot remember instructions or conversation when you ask him to repeat back what has just been said.
If anyone has managed to read to the end of this then thank you!! And I hope you have some ideas of what I am dealing with?! Thanks
