Hi All,
Apologies for posting such a specific topic in a 'general' discussion forum, but I found no one and no where else to find this.
My two boys have a diagnosis of ASD, but their father refuses to accept this. Since 2013 he began a campaign against me to the authorities stating that I 'induced' or 'created' the condition on the boys and 'manipulated the doctors' to think about it alongside many other derogatory defamations.
Then he used the childrens' typical autistic behaviour as an example as to how bad a mother I am, and stated that they only behave that way because i am cruel and abusive to them, despite no substance or evidence of any kind. There has never been an incident where the children appeared for eg. hurt in my care, saved for usual knees scrapes/knocks that the boys inflict on themselves when playing etc.
One would think that the court would consider the children's needs and appoint someone who understands autism to analyse if dad's claims are true or false before resorting to bias, but so far the few people who have seen my boys have shown no knowledge of the condition and have as much, if not more, prejudice than most average people who are ignorant of the condition.
To explain better: I have been first denigrated by dad, and later by the authors of reports with interpretations that distorts all science-based autism research and practice to such an absurd level that defies one's belief.
For eg. When reading in an SEN statement that I practice pressure therapy with a bin bag, or cushions, or blankets etc (recommended by autism professionals since the 60s and as I later learned, a very commonly used technique to calm the children when they appear sensorially overwhelmed, or distressed somehow... as i am sure many here knows) alongside other strategies that helps them to cope with their everyday life.
However, the Social Worker, upon reading that I practice 'pressure therapy' (and making no further research/analysis, nor questions to the children or myself as to how I practice these therapies in the children) wrote in her report that by doing so I may be 'cause further anxiety' in the children, then suggesting that I may 'aphixiate' the children.
I couldn't believe that a therapy has been interpreted this way and this was not the only offensive absurd she said in her report. With a court hearing approaching I would like to find an Autism professional expert that can testify ASD behaviours and therapies uses in court. Someone ideally recommended by NAS that makes use of sound, science-based and contemporary therapies, someone who understands the children's sensorial needs, behavior, as well the general needs of someone in the spectrum, that could explain in court whether my children's behaviors is or is not appropriate autistic behavior.
If such professional has experience also in children who have been abused, that would be even better because it would be benefitial to explore whether there are signs of abuse intertwinning with their condition. Because I am an innocent mother who have gone more than many miles to get the right resources in place for my children, I have never done anything wrong for them or anyone else for that matter.
Without a competent Autism expert professional reporting on these very serious allegations alongside the miscarriage of the system by incompetent agency workers I am feeling hopeless that the children's needs will be understood in court. I have approached all our local health professionals and the CAMHS team that diagnosed my boys, including their OT (who left her post since discharging us) but my children's psychologist avoid the court like the plague. Even letters they refused to give as soon as you mention the word 'court'.
The irony of this all, is that if I had the children diagnosed, but provided no therapy to them I would probably also be accused of failing them for the opposite reasons above.
I am in a catch-22 situation where I ended up in court asking for help against abuse, and found myself violated further and without the opportunity to even deffend my children's needs in court. Its very frustrating but I hope here that there will be recommendations.
Many thanks in advance for any advice.
Kind regards,
Rq
