Can someone help me understand?

Coogybear said:

Post diagnosis, I had a real revelation about my life and about why I struggled so much in so many different ways. I found it both liberating and cathartic to a certain extent.

As a result of a number of more recent events, I find myself questioning why I’m so keen to prove I can manage independently, when there are obvious indicators that I struggle.

What should I do with this Knowledge of diagnosis?

Hopefully won't seem to symplistic but, seek help with the things that are hard and you feel you need to, though you sound like you've done well in so many ares and should be proud. 

Am I a success as an independent Aspie Adult or a failure?  I’m pretty sure I don’t get things wrong all the time, but does make me a Success?

Mostly i would say yes, but they maybe be some difficulties you may need help with but you sound like most of the time you've done well.

Should I be asking others for help with my life or should I carry on as I always have?

How well do you feel you're managing? do you feel you need help and would benefit from it, anydifficulties it may be hardto accept if you need it but if you need help its there, if you're then carry on.

I value my independence, but as the realization dawns that there are some major issues to my independent living, I have to question. How do other independent Aspies live?

Not one i can answer fully, no doubt alot of qwerks and differences that vary among people, but manage. I'm sure other members on here can answer better.

Do they have enablers in their life?

I'm not 100% what that is but i assume its people that help? I would guess that alot get help from Social services, local access team and other possable charities.

Are they reliant on others for assistance in the realms they find difficult?

I would imagine alot are, me soon too. I 'd never of imadgened such a thing  But to fit in such a NT world, may be just the thing.

Or do they relinquish all responsibility to others?

I don't think most ASD's do, i'm on the brink of getting my money taken care of but i've still worked and am capable of alot 'most of it i do better than NT's'. If you've coped all along then you must be doing well, you local access team will just offer advice if thats all thats all you need.

Am I expecting too much of myself and my children to consider holding down a job or wanting to contribute to society? Surely it’s important to have a purpose?

I suppose time will tell with this, best to start part time with work for your kids.You may well be supprised, i think aslong as everyone finds something that they can relate to, cirtain difficulties can be over come.

As the roller coaster of life rolls on, I feel I have more questions than answers!

Feeling really lost just now and somewhat like a rabbit in the headlights.

Any questions please respone, to a great extent i feel the same, rather confused ethics seem to guide me more. The election has been a great destraction to me..

I’ve spent most of my life caring for others, yet I can barely care for myself…………

Coogybear said:

Post diagnosis, I had a real revelation about my life and about why I struggled so much in so many different ways. I found it both liberating and cathartic to a certain extent.

As a result of a number of more recent events, I find myself questioning why I’m so keen to prove I can manage independently, when there are obvious indicators that I struggle.

What should I do with this Knowledge of diagnosis?

Hopefully won't seem to symplistic but, seek help with the things that are hard and you feel you need to, though you sound like you've done well in so many ares and should be proud. 

Am I a success as an independent Aspie Adult or a failure?  I’m pretty sure I don’t get things wrong all the time, but does make me a Success?

Mostly i would say yes, but they maybe be some difficulties you may need help with but you sound like most of the time you've done well.

Should I be asking others for help with my life or should I carry on as I always have?

How well do you feel you're managing? do you feel you need help and would benefit from it, anydifficulties it may be hardto accept if you need it but if you need help its there, if you're then carry on.

I value my independence, but as the realization dawns that there are some major issues to my independent living, I have to question. How do other independent Aspies live?

Not one i can answer fully, no doubt alot of qwerks and differences that vary among people, but manage. I'm sure other members on here can answer better.

Do they have enablers in their life?

I'm not 100% what that is but i assume its people that help? I would guess that alot get help from Social services, local access team and other possable charities.

Are they reliant on others for assistance in the realms they find difficult?

I would imagine alot are, me soon too. I 'd never of imadgened such a thing  But to fit in such a NT world, may be just the thing.

Or do they relinquish all responsibility to others?

I don't think most ASD's do, i'm on the brink of getting my money taken care of but i've still worked and am capable of alot 'most of it i do better than NT's'. If you've coped all along then you must be doing well, you local access team will just offer advice if thats all thats all you need.

Am I expecting too much of myself and my children to consider holding down a job or wanting to contribute to society? Surely it’s important to have a purpose?

I suppose time will tell with this, best to start part time with work for your kids.You may well be supprised, i think aslong as everyone finds something that they can relate to, cirtain difficulties can be over come.

As the roller coaster of life rolls on, I feel I have more questions than answers!

Feeling really lost just now and somewhat like a rabbit in the headlights.

Any questions please respone, to a great extent i feel the same, rather confused ethics seem to guide me more. The election has been a great destraction to me..

I’ve spent most of my life caring for others, yet I can barely care for myself…………