• Replies 11 replies
  • Subscribers 33 subscribers
  • Views 248 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Some deeper thoughts

Alien0n3arth

I can see quite much disagreement around the spectrum. There are people, who say that autistic people with lower support needs shouldn't be actually diagnosed with autism. There are people, who get angry, that their diagnosis is not being taken seriously anymore. There are people, who get diagnosed just to have the information/ confirmation of their experience. (And its fine) I think, that it's not only about their lives. The more late diagnosed autistic people,  the more insights into the possible future of autistic children. It's always being talked about autistic children,  but very little about adults. I myself found another reason, to go through the process. Half year ago, I also shared that story here, my daughters teacher in nursery approached me and asked me if I would like to share my experience with one family, who's son is probably autistic.  I told her I'm also only probably autistic, it's not sure yet. But I agreed. I described my early development,  which turned out to be very similar to that boy's, my difficulties at school. I prepared that carefully, to not make my story dramatic, but useful instead. The boy got already diagnosed,  I'm awaiting assessment. His mom, who I talked to, expressed her gratitude for sharing my story and lending her a book about autism. So I think that late diagnosed or recognised people are not problematic (as many say) instead, they can help families to prepare and understand their autistic children better. 

When it comes to disagreements around the "what is autism and what's not" I can only say- it's duty of professionals, who work on it, to categorise this or that condition.  For me the most Important thing is having proper diagnosis,  that describes my difficulties correctly. I used to be misdiagnosed multiple times in my life and also mistreated. I think that the spectrum with levels of support needs make a lot if sense, especially because there are many people,  who tick the same list of symptoms,  but their needs change throughout their lives, and autism is a life long condition. 

If anyone has any thoughts about this topic, can share them with me.

Parents

  • I think that the flap over late diagnosed adults, is mostly just that a flap, parents get scared that they've done something wrong when their child gets diagnosed as part of the ever present parental guilt trap that we all seem to fall into at some point. None of it is helped by the ignorant staements put out by the like's of US Health Secretary Kenedy, listing all the things that "we" can't or won't be able to do. Later diagnosis  shows the lie to much of this, it shows people going about thier lives quite happily, having jobs, relationships and children of thier own. Yes we have problems with some things, but so does everybody and some of our problems have nothing to do with autism.

    The more people who are being diagnosed, the more normal ND including autism is starting to look and thats scary for a lot of people, we look just like them, we hide in plain sight, all the while we've got this "thing" that maybe threatening. It's also a nice trope for politicians to argue over, are we being "woke" or are we just recognising something thats always been there?

    Life changes as we get older so obviously autistic life will change too, as a society we're uncomfortable with aging and the changes that come with it for example I just read something in the Guardian about how you're more likely to get a dog or a bloke named Chris in a film than a woman who's over 60. AS we age e might need things like HRT, joints replacing, we might need adjustments at work or different work as our aging bodies can no longer do the things they did when we were younger. These things exist across spectrums, being ND or not shouldn't determine the need for new knees, nor should it determine any psychological help we may need, these things are facts of life.

    Humans like to catagorise things and one of those catagories is "us and them" if high functioning Autistic people can be "undiagnosed" then it create more "us" and a smaller group of "them", who will also be less able to self advocate and demand their rightful place in society.

    I think you did a really good thing in taking the fear and some of the stigma away from this family and helping them to see that being autistic is just a way of being and not a life sentence of misery.

    I actually think the real problem with all these debates, are the NT's, they're finding they're not so typical and it's making them look at what being human really means not just abiding to a set of assumptions.

  • in reply to TheCatWoman

    I can agree and maybe also a bit disagree. I don't think NTs care that much about them not being so typical. There is still the autism with high support needs. Some parents of profoundly autistic people get angry, that now they have to explain, that their child has high support needs. I don't see anything wrong in it. Autistic level 3 support is quite clear. 

    For me autism is not just a way of being. It's me being more vulnerable and needing protection,  therapy and support to be able to self advocate. It's also limited ability to recognise my feelings and the state of my body. It's the difficulty recognising when I should say 'stop' to someone etc. And many other difficulties. I let that family see, that their son may also achieve things in life. I told them, what support I needed but never received and answered to their questions about my perception to help them understand better their son's behaviour. Honestly when I see this boy in the nursery,  while dropping off or picking up my daughter,  I have an impression that I look at myself when I was at his age. Sometimes he greets me with smile, I respond. I look at him and think: "I wish your life won't be hard, I wish you all best and support and success".

  • in reply to Alien0n3arth

    Is that "just" an autistic thing though? Lots of people struggle with emotional literacry, and manipulative people will home in on those less able to say no to them, but it is something that autistic people seen particularly prone too.

    Lots of people do have higher support needs, but that shouldn't invalidate those of us who don't, we might have quite high support need in some areas some of the time, but because our needs aren't consistent they get overlooked and overruled

  • in reply to TheCatWoman

    Yes, I think you are right. From my experience I can say, NTs usually don't like me the moment they see me. Just instinctively. Fir them, if you are different,  if you don't fit, if your view or opinion is different,  then you are the problem. In my case usually I was the problem and couldn't understand why.

Reply
  • in reply to TheCatWoman

    Yes, I think you are right. From my experience I can say, NTs usually don't like me the moment they see me. Just instinctively. Fir them, if you are different,  if you don't fit, if your view or opinion is different,  then you are the problem. In my case usually I was the problem and couldn't understand why.

Children
No Data