Starving for love and affection we don’t know by instinct where to fix the limits of a relationship, so we want more than we can have, while we are less capable to give, to love, to protect, to tolerate other people’s failures, weaknesses needs. We lack the natural competence in the language, grammar or syntax of relating to others. It’s like missing the motive, the phrase, the theme; not being attuned in a musical duet or choir. It’s like doing the wrong step in a march or limping when we walk in company. It’s disharmony, dissonance, going astray, getting lost. In a school of fishes, in a flock of birds, in a pack of wolves each individual knows his place, by instinct, hasn’t learnt it. Birds fly thousands of miles keeping the same vicinity to others and the same distance. If they don’t they have a rough life, or perish.
