• Replies 5 replies
  • Subscribers 32 subscribers
  • Views 227 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Processing ≠ Agreement: A Neurodivergent Perspective on Meetings

Packet
Has anyone else noticed how in neurotypical meetings, silence is often interpreted as agreement?
As someone who processes information deeply and sometimes needs time to reflect before responding, I find this assumption problematic. When I take the time I need and later share my thoughts—often via email or another asynchronous method—my input can be met with resistance or even seen as disruptive.
It feels like there's a mismatch in communication styles: neurotypical norms often prioritize immediacy, while neurodivergent minds may prioritize accuracy and depth. The result? A rebuttal that’s seen as obstinate rather than constructive.
Curious to hear if others have experienced this. How do you navigate these dynamics? Have you found ways to advocate for your processing style in group settings?
Parents

  • I've noticed the same, I think there's also a gender thing going on too, men are far more willing to take silence as agreement and also they will silence others who disagree. Most of the metings I've been to was from when I was part of a co-operative so there was no hierarchy, often one or two people objected to an idea so the item was put back on the agenda for next months meeting. One thing I did become aware of, is that some people really struggle to say what they think and feel and it's not just a problem for ND's, when asked why they disagree they often become hostile and defencive. 

Reply

  • I've noticed the same, I think there's also a gender thing going on too, men are far more willing to take silence as agreement and also they will silence others who disagree. Most of the metings I've been to was from when I was part of a co-operative so there was no hierarchy, often one or two people objected to an idea so the item was put back on the agenda for next months meeting. One thing I did become aware of, is that some people really struggle to say what they think and feel and it's not just a problem for ND's, when asked why they disagree they often become hostile and defencive. 

Children
  • in reply to TheCatWoman
    TheCatWoman said:
    I think there's also a gender thing going on too, men are far more willing to take silence as agreement and also they will silence others who disagree.

    I don't think it is a gender thing - it is more an impatient person in power thing (I used to get this all the time with female managers too).

    They are often impatient for whatever reason and just want to get on and get the thing "sorted" so you are given a chance to respond and if you can't do it in the small time window then that is considered your problem by them.