When Games Stop Feeling Like Play – A Neurodivergent Perspective

Lately, I’ve found myself struggling to connect with video games—once a reliable outlet and source of joy. It’s not a case of anhedonia in the traditional mental health sense, but more a growing apathy toward design choices that feel misaligned with how I experience the world.
For example, third-person cameras often leave me feeling disembodied, and overly grandiose architecture can be visually overwhelming. These elements, while perhaps intended to impress, end up making me tune out. I’ve noticed that many games seem more focused on how designers want players to experience the world, rather than offering flexible ways for us to engage with it.
As someone who is neurodivergent, I often want to role-play as a pacifist or a cautious character. But many games don’t support that kind of playstyle. It’s not about needing a fully open world—just having meaningful choices matter. When those options are missing, it can feel alienating.
One specific challenge I’ve faced is around how games handle death and resurrection. When the lore doesn’t explain what’s happening, it breaks immersion. It feels like my character is revived through unexplained magic, which can be jarring. Some games have handled this well—like World of Warcraft with its spirit healers, or BioShock with the Vita-Chambers—providing a narrative framework that makes the experience feel coherent.
I’m sharing this in hopes of opening up a conversation about how game design can better accommodate neurodivergent players. Games have the potential to be inclusive, immersive, and healing—but only if they’re built with diverse experiences in mind.
Parents
  • My favourite games still feel like play, but I'm extremely choosy about what I play. I'll try to address your points in order.

    I usually prefer a third person perspective - if I've spent time in character creation or choosing or getting clothing/armour, I like to be able to see them. Sometimes it's easier to see enemies approaching, and in Assassins creed Odyssey I learned to get my avatar to swing a sword at enemies whilst riding a horse round in circles - not really possible in first person. Some games have a choice of first or third person, which I think is ideal.

    overly grandiose architecture can be visually overwhelming

    Visually, my favourite game is Hogwarts Legacy - the school is in a grandiose castle, but the colours are muted and the textures rendered beautifully. I dislike lots of vivid colours, particularly when everything is moving fast as well. Assassins creed Odyssey and Origins are set in beautiful landscapes, which for me enhances the game experience.

    You say you would like to play as a pacifist or cautious character. There are non fighting games such as simulation ones, but in a game where there are enemies to contend with, it could be difficult to build in a pacifist character - they'd probably get killed a lot. What sort of story would you like to see which includes a pacifist avatar?

    One of my favourite games is Fallout 4, which has multiple choices about which faction to join. The Minutemen help protect farmers from attacks (is that so they can have a share of their food?) but are technologically backward and set up base in an old damp castle. The institute are technologically advanced and could rebuild the world, but use sentient synths as slaves. The Railroad want to set the synths free, but will kill humans to achieve their goal. The Brotherhood of steel have a strong military structure, but want to kill all synths and wipe out the institute and its technology. It's not an easy choice, and it's a very thought provoking game. I think it might help ND players see shades of grey, rather than black and white thinking.

    You mention open worlds - that's something I'd like to see more of. One of my favourites is Sims 4, but the constant loading is so annoying. 

    I find dying in games annoying, although not as annoying as Star Wars Outlaws where if you get seen you just keep being sent back to the previous part of the story and have to keep doing the same bit over and over. There should be an option to skip it if you want. I loved BioShock and BioShock 2, although to be honest I can't say I really understood all of what was going on - it was just a great experience.

    The main thing I would like to see is for all games to have a single player option. Some games only have an online co-op option, but I don't want to play with others, I just like to have my own challenges.

Reply
  • My favourite games still feel like play, but I'm extremely choosy about what I play. I'll try to address your points in order.

    I usually prefer a third person perspective - if I've spent time in character creation or choosing or getting clothing/armour, I like to be able to see them. Sometimes it's easier to see enemies approaching, and in Assassins creed Odyssey I learned to get my avatar to swing a sword at enemies whilst riding a horse round in circles - not really possible in first person. Some games have a choice of first or third person, which I think is ideal.

    overly grandiose architecture can be visually overwhelming

    Visually, my favourite game is Hogwarts Legacy - the school is in a grandiose castle, but the colours are muted and the textures rendered beautifully. I dislike lots of vivid colours, particularly when everything is moving fast as well. Assassins creed Odyssey and Origins are set in beautiful landscapes, which for me enhances the game experience.

    You say you would like to play as a pacifist or cautious character. There are non fighting games such as simulation ones, but in a game where there are enemies to contend with, it could be difficult to build in a pacifist character - they'd probably get killed a lot. What sort of story would you like to see which includes a pacifist avatar?

    One of my favourite games is Fallout 4, which has multiple choices about which faction to join. The Minutemen help protect farmers from attacks (is that so they can have a share of their food?) but are technologically backward and set up base in an old damp castle. The institute are technologically advanced and could rebuild the world, but use sentient synths as slaves. The Railroad want to set the synths free, but will kill humans to achieve their goal. The Brotherhood of steel have a strong military structure, but want to kill all synths and wipe out the institute and its technology. It's not an easy choice, and it's a very thought provoking game. I think it might help ND players see shades of grey, rather than black and white thinking.

    You mention open worlds - that's something I'd like to see more of. One of my favourites is Sims 4, but the constant loading is so annoying. 

    I find dying in games annoying, although not as annoying as Star Wars Outlaws where if you get seen you just keep being sent back to the previous part of the story and have to keep doing the same bit over and over. There should be an option to skip it if you want. I loved BioShock and BioShock 2, although to be honest I can't say I really understood all of what was going on - it was just a great experience.

    The main thing I would like to see is for all games to have a single player option. Some games only have an online co-op option, but I don't want to play with others, I just like to have my own challenges.

Children
  • Actually, Hogwarts Legacy is the example I had in mind. It helps me relax and fall asleep, and I really enjoy exploring the castle. When I mentioned grandiose architecture, I was thinking more of the giant pyramid at the beginning of Talos Principle 2.
    I just wish Hogwarts Legacy allowed me to use Expelliarmus purely to disarm, so that creatures would yield rather than be defeated. I don’t consider myself a weak pacifist—it's more that I’m uncomfortable with the idea of having to reduce health bars to zero. Hogwarts Legacy is a prime example of a game where I’d love to play as a pacifist. Being pacifist doesn’t mean being defenseless, and it certainly doesn’t mean avoiding responsibility.
    For instance, I overheard some poachers discussing Hogwarts’ defenses, so I ran to find a teacher—but there was no way to alert them. Maybe if we had gone there in large numbers, we could have scared the poachers off. I’d love to see more options like that in future updates or games.