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Going to university...

Lyndsay

Hi everyone. 
I was just wondering if anyone could help me with difficulties I'm having regarding university...
So I'm 17, and I'll be leaving home for university next September. My main worry is that I won't be able to cope without my family because I guess I'm quite attached to my mum and dad still, I hardly leave the house and don't really like going out much, therefore I'm in the house with my parents most of my time. I'm aware that this is because of my Aspergers, but I'm just worried about how I will cope. Sometimes I think I will be able to go to university and be able to cope fine, but then reality hits and I realise I will probably be a crying mess before they have even dropped me off. So I'm looking at a university which is about 40 minutes from home, and my sister lives less than 10 minutes away which is perfect, but I just feel like I'll be isolated whenever I'm at the actual university. Of course I'm worried about making friends; it takes me a long time to trust someone fully, and I'm happy with my one close friend that I have now (however she wants to go to a university which is down South so I don't think I'll see her as often as I would like). And I'm just worried about the whole idea in general. I was wondering if university is as bad as I think. Don't get me wrong, I am excited to learn my subject there because I have a lot of interest in it, but it's just everything else that goes with the experience, e.g making friends, just living on my own. Any advice would be really appreciated Smile Thanks

Parents

  • before I started uni I had the same concerns as you and was planning on going to a more local university and staying at home, but I went to different interviews for practice and got into a different one which I really liked but was 2 hours by train from my parents. I felt brave at the time and accepted the place. I am so pleased that I did, I had the best time at university and even stayed there after uni for a few years before I ended up having to move back home. 

    If you stay in halls of residents or a shared flat you will meet people there and have people to go to the freshers events with (they are well worth going to even if you just go for a short time, if you feel uncomfortable then you can always leave the party or whatever, but do try to make yourself go to everything!) you will meet people there and remember that everyone is new, no one knows anyone and they're all nervous too. its strange because I've never found it easy to make friends either but i met people in my first week at the freshers events and they became like a second family in that time. I really recommend you talk to the disability officer to let them know you have ASD and if you have any issues, they can help you sort them, you'll probably also be entitled to the disabled students allowance which will pay for you to have any equipment which might help you with your studies. 

    Hope you enjoy the open day and good luck!!

Reply

  • before I started uni I had the same concerns as you and was planning on going to a more local university and staying at home, but I went to different interviews for practice and got into a different one which I really liked but was 2 hours by train from my parents. I felt brave at the time and accepted the place. I am so pleased that I did, I had the best time at university and even stayed there after uni for a few years before I ended up having to move back home. 

    If you stay in halls of residents or a shared flat you will meet people there and have people to go to the freshers events with (they are well worth going to even if you just go for a short time, if you feel uncomfortable then you can always leave the party or whatever, but do try to make yourself go to everything!) you will meet people there and remember that everyone is new, no one knows anyone and they're all nervous too. its strange because I've never found it easy to make friends either but i met people in my first week at the freshers events and they became like a second family in that time. I really recommend you talk to the disability officer to let them know you have ASD and if you have any issues, they can help you sort them, you'll probably also be entitled to the disabled students allowance which will pay for you to have any equipment which might help you with your studies. 

    Hope you enjoy the open day and good luck!!

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