I can't fight any more

Have you ever considered taking your concerns to the media.  It sounds drastic, but as your son is leaving... no school, college likes negative publicity.

If you can afford it, a strongly worded letter from a solicitor may get their attention.

I think you need someone on your side.

It is so difficult getting support for our children.  I have recently learnt that my son's tutors send his Lsa's off on errands such as doing photocopying, when they are supposed to be helping my child.  He has missed deadlines as a result as no one is there to help him with his organisational skills.

I have made a formal complaint, but it is stressful and it just shouldn't be.

Keep strong.

Hi Coogeybear,

I understand where you are coming from.  It feels like I am constantly battling the system to get anyhere at all.  It often feels like I am just treading water, trying to keep my head up.

Is there any way you could get an evening out with your friends, it won't solve the problem, but it will give you a moment totake a step back and breathe. 

It is so hard to keep fighting, and so unfair that we have to, but then I look at my hooligan, and go into battle again.

We are all here to listen if that is any help.  Feel better soon  x

I appreciate you feel it is pointless if your son has chosen to leave, but if the LEA is asking you to follow up it may be because there is some discrepancy between what they are told by the college and what your son experienced, that needs to be challenged.

What does it say about equalities and disability on the College's website, both in terms of Equal Opportunity Policy and Disability Support.

There is a very wide variation on the provisions of FE Colleges. One problem lies with whether they take autism seriously, ignoring it if there is no associated learning difficulty.

The other thing to watch for is whether they are adhering to the social model of disability, which means mockingly that as long as they put in wheelchair ramps, issue handouts on coloured paper, or allow extra time in exams, they perceive they are meeting their obligations.

There really is a serious problem here. Universities, while by no means perfect, have addressed disability support, many FE colleges haven't.

Unfortunately to get to university many students with or without disability spend some time at FE college bridging gaps. And they are denied opportunities by the lax way FE Colleges are administered.

I wrote to the Department of Health Autism Team on 21st April with reference to the Think Autism Report, pointing out, for example, thar even in London the provisions made by FE colleges are atrociously poor and flout the Disability Discrimination Act let alone the Autism Act, but nobody does anything. And needless to say I've had no reply or acknowledgement. So here is a name and shame for London (Mods permitting):

There is nothing about learning support on the websites of Barking & Dagenham, Barnet and Southgate, Coulsden, Haringey, Enfield & North-East London, South Thames, Tower Hamlets.

Alright maybe they have provisions but if I cannot find them on their websites that's inexcusable.

Some have disability support on their web pages, and mention learning disability or dyslexia, but nothing I can find about autism or aspergers - North-West London, Hackney, Harrow, and Havering.  OK, again, maybe they have autism provision but why not say so?

At Kensington & Chelsea College there's a mention of autism under the expertise of a member of staff, but nothing else.

Now for London that's a shocking indictment. And go into the provinces it only gets worse.

So if you could bring yourself to follow through the complaint, it would very probably mean a lot.

Oh, NAS, I hear you say - where are NAS in all this?...sorry mate, haven't the foggiest.....

Hi Coogeybear.  I know how you feel.  It's like your emotional + physical reserves have run out, all used up with all the worries/battles etc over the years.  It's because you're having to carry too much for too long on your own shoulders without enough support.  Your mind and body are exhausted.   I think if you were feeling better then you would fight the FE college; it's whether you're able to at the moment.  Only you can decide that.  Remember how important it is to look after your health, that should come 1st.  You can only do so much, you're only human, altho I bet for years you've been more "superhuman" than many others.  Whatever you decide, be kind to yourself.

That is a lot to deal with, I can't help you unfortunately as I haven't experienced it. But I hope that things get sorted for you soon. It's terrible that the college aren't understanding and accommodative of your sons problems and you shouldn't have to fight, that's the worst part, why should you even need to. I do hope you find the strength to stand up for yours and your sons rights.