Do you think NT's/normal people understand how much our special interest means to us?

Other peoples actions can do damage to you mentally. I tried so hard to maintain friends and get social rules right but after so many rejections I don't bother now. I make extra effort to avoid social sitautions now. I don't like to be noticed and have the ability to enter a room and no one would even know I was there for about 5-10 minutes. I support group for people with aspergers syndrome may be a good idea to start getting back into your interests as everyone within the group would understand you.

I used to have several special interests when I was younger but I had no idea that I had Aspergers.  Back then I was labelled Maladjusted or Emotionally Disturbed - I soon learned not to talk about that.

I don't seem to have special interests anymore as an adult although in part I think this is because the Aspy side of me took such a beating in my early adulthood that he's now very deeply withdrawn inside me and the me that you might see in a Pub is an outer skin rather than really me.

I think the special interests were as much a refuge from a confusing and frightening world as they were an interest in themselves.  And the intensity of the interest reflects, for me anyway, one of the key words for Aspergers - intensity.

It would really help me now if I could rediscover some of those interests and find some refuge from my current situation.

Special interests are important as they are a good way to relax. I understand this very well. I haven't been diagnosed with aspergers yet but I have had a referral for diagnosis and just waiting now. I enjoy Art. I like to draw and it's an activity I enjoy and understand. I like to gain new knowledge all the time and therefore undergo this when I need time away from the rest of the world. I have difficulty using words to express feelings and therefore draw instead, many people don't understand this and find it strange and I find it relieving. I can cope being around people for a certain amount of time but then refer to an activity I like and have time alone to myself.

It can be very distressing to not have these activities to refer to. I do understand.

Yeah, I get this too, it is most irritating and borderline offensive.

Hi, Mason.  My NT family totally understand how intense my special interests are, but other NTs tend to think I'm being a drama queen. They get irritated with me. Conversely, lots of people try and be understanding but fail; they say things like, "Oh, I have interests like that - we all do," and I feel like they're trivialising my feelings.

Hi Hope, no I haven't tried to get a diagnosis yet, I keep wanting to but I'm scared of doctors, and ringing people, so ringing up and making an appointment is a big problem for me. I do think it would help but I've had bad experiences with GP's and I have trouble explaining things, I'm not a great communicator, so I don't think he would listen also doesn't help that our doctor had to leave because of speaking inappropriately to patients so we now have horrible locum doctors. 

As for hobbies I enjoy puzzles, particularly addictive ones like the Rubik's cube which I can happily solve over and over for hours, but last week the chef at work lent me his revomaze puzzle, i managed to solve it in two days (took 4.5 hours) it was so good, I want another but can't afford one. He never made it into the maze and no one else at work could do it either so they're all impressed with it but they can't understand my level of patients with it, they get frustrated after a couple of minutes. I don't find the puzzle frustrating at all, but people interrupting me while I'm concentrating on it is very frustrating! I also enjoy memorising alphabets (Braille, Greek, Hebrew, japanese hiragana) and the periodic table which I know in order forwards and backwards. I guess I just find these things relaxing and the rest of the world is stressful and complicated.

I think the only person that understands their special interest is the person themselves.  Even other autistic people, if they aren't interested in the same thing wouldn't understand it, although they might understand the level of interest another autistic person might have.  Some NTs are very obsessed with their hobbies too, but although that's purely for pleasure, with people on the spectrum it's the pleasure aspect but also a control of our world and filtering out of stressful environments.

Mason, have you tried to get an official diagnosis for yourself?

The most intense special interest I ever had was with the film actress and Celebrity Kate Winslet. I was obsessed with her ever since I saw the film Titanic on video (those were the days!) when I was 11. I never saw the film at the cinema because I was too young.

I saw the film because I was already obsessed with the Titanic as an historical event, and knew everything about it, all the facts and figures. I fell in love with Kate Winslet through her character, Rose,  and saw the film so often that I inadvertently memorised the whole screen-play!.  I saw all the other Winslet movies as well, and anything that included Winslet, even if it was only a cameo role. I knew everything about her life, and could not think about anything else. During a time when I had no friends, I was obsessed with her for 8 years. If I could not pursue the interest for whatever reason, I would go into a complete fit of anxiety and anger.

Currently I am not mega obsessed with any particular interest, although I have disabling OCD, but I do have moments when I enjoy collecting information about a particular subject.

Well, I was trying to explain it to my dad because I know he doesn't understand autism at all. My interests can be quite odd and he accepts that and just goes with it and doesn't see why it's a problem. I tried to explain that the problem isn't the interest itself but the intensity at which I'm interested, that it's all I want to do and the stress and anxiety I feel when I have to come away from it to go to work and how it can makes normal daily living more stressful and difficult when I can't do these things. He said he doesn't feel that way about anything but understands when someone interrupts him while he's trying to do something it gets a bit annoying... I told him that's not the same thing and he just doesn't understand it. I find it very difficult how people don't understand me and I was never officially diagnosed although my parents admit they knew I had 'problems' but didn't know what it was and didn't want me to be labelled. Id rather have the label and therfore the understanding of myself. 

I am an nt mum with two asc teenage boys.  I do understand how important the boys special interests are.  It helps them recharge and calms them.  It is a  world that is special and unique to them that they can control, so I fully support their special interests. Plus it gives me some free time to indulge in my hobbies, so we all win.

Hope you have a good week after your pleasant weekend.