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Online Troubles

NAS91231

Hello I am new to this group, I am a bit lost my daughter has autism and has been going online alot on apps such as snap chat and yubo.  I have received alot of messages from girls who are concerned for her as men are taking the "*iss" out of her and asking her to do things online that she shouldnt be doing.  She has told me she is just talking to friends online but this obviously is not the case.  It has got serious so I have had to suspend her phone line for her own safety, has anyone experienced problems with their daughter/son online?  Please in need of help!! 

  • in reply to NAS91231

    I'm wired the same. In a bloke it can be seen as "Bravery" and be no bad thing if it doesn't kill you first. 

  • To what extent have you discussed this with your daughter and to what level of detail? I had a lot of trouble with sex education and online safety at school in that they built so much of the stuff around metaphors and 'implied' understanding. Including methods of contraception!! Which I will have a rant about on some other discussion.

    I agree with I Sperg, you've done the important thing of cutting her off from it.

    But what I'm saying is you are likely to have to have a really explicit conversation about what is and isn't acceptable to do for other people and in what contexts. And I mean really explicit, I recommend the use of diagrams. Try and get to a point where she can ask you what is and isn't acceptable.

    I was not in that position because I was very unsociable and had no social media and if anything was oversuspicious of others, due to past bullying. However, my ability to work out what 'safe' places are at night, and at what times/light levels places are safe is non existent. Which really freaks my friends out. So they like it if I ask them first and then they can tell me whether I need to change my route/timing or whatever. That kind of relationship is ideal, even if it feels awkward when you're first working on it. 

    Hope that helps in some way

  • in reply to I Sperg

    thank you, because of her autism/adhd she doesnt recognise fear which is scary enough!!

  • Wow, that's frightening.

    Most of the "men" online are fairly harmless idiots, but there really ARE monsters out there.

    You've done the important thing, cut her off from it, now you have to do the vital and important thing of getting her to understand the potentially hideous danger she put herself in. 

    My daughter was taught to only do the stuff I told her not to after she was 18. That was the deal that worked for her. Agreements made in good faith both ways worked way better than "discipline" for us.  

    That's all I got.