'Training' kids to socialize

I found this article online.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/psychology-meets-neurodiversity/202308/should-autistic-children-be-trained-to-socialize

I'm not sure I entirely like the idea of trying to 'train' autistic kids, or adults come to that, to be more social.

More support is what's needed. We don't need to be trained to socialize. We aren't dogs! 

What does require more training is the professionals' understanding of autism.

Thoughts on this?

  • I don’t think we need to be trained to socialise. In fact that is likely to make us ill as it will involve a lot of masking.

    I think that giving kids the tools to be able to socialise when they need or want to is important.

    When you think about it, we lack the intuitive social skills that the other 95% or so of the population have, so for us to function in that society there will be times when we have to engage with it, and being able to do this effectively without expecting the other 95% of society to have to educate themselves about is seems the most sensible way forward.

    Clearly it is not a substitute for being authentic but as a stopgap while socienty catches up with our minority needs it is a good idea to me.

  • I thought it was interesting as well.

    I didn't take training as that either not o do worry that some people will. A lot of people I've interacted with have had a bad impression on us, on autism. I've been trying my hardest to show people the right impression.

    I think it would also be good if you had a mix of kids in those groups. And rather than focusing on stuff like eye contact(because seriously who cares) it should be things like how to feel comfortable in larger groups or in situations with background noise etc.

    I agree! This would be beneficial greatly for many autistic children and adults. Good point.

  • Well said! Yes I have and you are right it is very fitting.

    Yes we are already social, in our own way and that is key I think. If more people understood then training wouldn't be needed. I think you're right, training would result in a lot of people masking. Training is like learning and I remember how much masking was required when I was at school! It resulted in burnout and a lot of trauma.

  • I don’t think we need to be trained to socialise. In fact that is likely to make us ill as it will involve a lot of masking. Autistic people are not deficient in socialising, we just socialise and communicate in a different way- so it’s not a matter of trying to be someone we are not but it’s about finding likeminded people that we can be ourselves with. Have you ever heard of the double empathy hypothesis? This is quite fitting here. 

  • It's definitely an interesting read. 

    I don't take the term "train" to mean anything derogatory - liking us to dogs - but rather take it in the same context as training someone for a new job.

    That being said however, I think that social skills can be good, but only for those who want it. Neurotypical people should be making more of an effort to adapt to autistic ways. Social norms are stupid 9/10 times anyway tbh.

    I think it would also be good if you had a mix of kids in those groups. And rather than focusing on stuff like eye contact(because seriously who cares) it should be things like how to feel comfortable in larger groups or in situations with background noise etc.