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Dealing with being overwhelmed??

Jay

Hi guys, I’m new here and recently got my diagnosis (June), this is my first post. So not sure if it’s relevant. 

But I was just wondering, in general has anyone got any tips on handling the feeling of being overwhelmed? I’m not sure if this even is because of my autism but figured this is the best place to find out. 

what I mean by being overwhelmed is for example I had to help my dad by doing his power of attorney request and help to speak his mobile provider as his phone wasn’t working. I spent all weekend thinking about this and was really stressed all day leading up to it. Snappy, short, distracted. I had this feeling that I had far too much going on and just generally felt overwhelmed. 

It took me a total of about an hour to do what I had to do and I just remember finishing it and thinking ‘why have I stressed so much over that!’

  • in reply to Sparkles

    Oh yes.....lots and lots and lots of time.

  • Hi Jay! I'm in the same boat, so I feel your pain. Just wanted you to know, you are not alone.

    What has helped me (some) is writing things down, but I would love to hear opinions of other people on this matter, as well. I get easily distracted and overwhelmed by things and then most times, many things that I wanted to get done, do not get done. So, I definitely understand...lots of wasted time.

  • in reply to Jay

    Yes it is. Autism is one big journey of self discovery, you learn from experience and it's helpful getting advice and insights from the other lovely people here. We help each other and that's a beautiful thing.

  • in reply to Katy Chocolate Lover

    It’s strange but I feel I’ve masked that much in my life that I don’t even really know how to be myself. But I guess it’s all part of the journey. 

  • in reply to Jay

    You are welcome and I'm glad you're feeling more normal being here. We're all normal here, don't need to mask, we can be ourselves Slight smile

  • in reply to Homebird

    Hi homebird,

    thanks for the tip. I do a similar thing for interviews so I’ll definitely give this a go as well! 

  • Hi Jay. If I have a call to make I tend to write down what I need to say so I don't have to keep going through it in my mind. That reduces the pressure and try make calls early in the day so I can relax after.

  • in reply to Deleted User

    Morning Number,

     Thank you for your reply. I’ve got to say I feel much calmer now. Think I had some first post nerves lol. 

    That’s also some great advice and I’ll definitely give it a try!

  • in reply to Katy Chocolate Lover

    Hi Katy,

    thank you for your reply. I’ve got to say, it’s a strange feeling to finally find somewhere that people understand me haha. A good strange though. 

    I will definitely utilise the support here moving forwards as even off of the few replies to this post I’m feeling more ‘normal’ than I ever have Blush

  • in reply to Autonomistic

    Hi Autonomistic,

    Thank you for your reply and some great advice there. So glad that it’s not just me that feels this way! 

  • Morning Jay.

    Welcome - and first off, rest assured that relevance is NOT something to worry about here !  All manner of nonsense is enjoyed here....and for the record...your post above is certainly very relevant to many of us.

    In terms of the overwhelm issue / example that you raise above.....I find that planning and research is key to keeping me calm.  If I needed to sort out power of attorney stuff on (say) Friday, then I would be researching and learning about what was involved, pitfalls etc from the Monday.  Similarly, if I need to sort out a friends mobile tariff/provider on a Thursday, then on the Wednesday, I would ring around a few to get a feel for how it will be for the "real event" the following day.

    When I am prepared, I am calm.  When there is an unexpected catastrophe, I am stone cold calm.  It's all the instances between these two poles that I risk overwhelm.

    Anyway, glad to have you here.

    Kind regards

    Number.

  • Welcome to the forum.

    I get easily overwhelmed as well, a lot of autistic people do unfortunately, we have so much to process and cope with it's hardly surprising is it? 

    Doing one thing at a time is great advice, and there's no shame in it or in taking things at a slower pace. That's what I do now, take it steady and one day at a time.

    This community is a safe place for you and full of very knowledgeable people so if you need any help or support come here and there will normally be someone who can help.

  • Welcome to the community.

    It helps to understand the theory of the monotropic autistic brain, That means we tend to have a single focus at any one time. Any more than that and it can lead to overwhelm.

    Try to do one thing at a time. If you find that thoughts about a future event are distracting and overwhelming you that's where mindfulness techniques can be useful, to bring your thoughts back to the present moment.

    I find that intense hyper focus on a special interest can help me feel less overwhelmed when there is a lot going on.

    I'm not saying that you shouldn't think about the future event at all. Planning for it can help reduce the anxiety. Set aside a specific time to do that planning, so that you can be confident you are prepared and do not need to think about it any more until it happens.

    Autistic people can find phone calls very difficult or even impossible, often due to auditory processing difficulties. It is therefore understandable that you were stressed about it. I'm pleased to hear it went well.