One advantage of knowing I have ASD is that I don’t take my mind-reading as seriously as I used to.
The following scenario -prior to diagnosis - was typical:
I carried out a task.
I looked at my colleague’s expression.
I couldn’t be sure but I decided it was critical; there was no smile.
I changed my work.
Knowing I have ASD means I now no longer believe I should take action based on my imaginary version of someone else’s reaction.
Instead, I am allowed to trust my senses and listen to real feedback from their real mouth with real words in the real time of that ‘now’ when the most real version of what is happening is happening.
Reality now no longer means ‘What I think’ but ‘What I sense’:
1.Real Hearing rather than thinking or imagining.
2.Real seeing rather than thinking or imagining.Real feeling rather than thinking or imagining.
3. Real smelling rather than thinking or imagining.
4. Real time when the senses are showing what is real, not the unreal time of memory or anticipation when ‘versions of reality’ are ineptly and torturously imposed by the imagination.
Reality is an infinity of facts. I choose my focus at the time the sevsss can apply themselves.
Memory only has my miniature version of reality. It misrepresents the whole picture.
Both memory and anticipation or worry about the future are literally ‘senseless’.
All time all space =reality
My 57 years my limited experience = insufficient guidance as to the nature of how things really are.
