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University is too overwhelming

J

I moved into university three weeks ago. I'm studying law. I had a terrible time at school but thought that the freedom that university gives you would make education much easier. 

I am registered with the disability services at my university and they have been great, but for the last week, things have been getting more and more overwhelming. My timetable changes every week and lecture locations change almost every day. I also have online classes that take longer than the time slot on the timetable and having to check our online website for all the work I have to do is very stressful.

It has become too much for me at the moment and I have had a really bad day with meltdowns. I can feel myself going to shutdown and I know that by tomorrow morning I won't be able to leave my flat or maybe my room. I have lectures all day and a tutorial tomorrow, where they take a register.

I'm starting to think that I can't handle university and will eventually drop out, but I have no idea what I would do instead of uni. It has been the only plan I've ever had for myself and I don't want to feel like even more of a failure by dropping out. I have no other skills apart from music, and that's an impossible field to get into so I'm not going to bother.

I don't really know what this post is for, maybe it's just a way to vent, but if anyone has a comment to make it will be appreciated.

  • I’m sorry you’re feeling like this. I think a lot of people go through this - and often early on in their first year (although people can hit a crisis at any point when they are at Uni). I know that in my first year I considered leaving as at times I felt I was both not coping and also not enjoying it. So how you feel is certainly not rare - and for autistic students I’d say it’s probably the norm! 
    First of all I’d say take a breath and pause. Don’t make any quick decisions. Try and access all the support you possibly can from family, friends and whatever is available through the college. Talk to people about how your feeling and ask for advice and support. Presumably your Uni has student welfare services etc? 
    it might well be that with a bit of help and advice you can work through the issues you’re currently having and continue your course and do really well. I went through a crisis of confidence in my first year and seriously considered leaving - but I’m so glad that I persevered. I didn’t find it easy but overall I’m glad I stayed. (I met my now husband there so it was worth it for that alone!). 
    of course you might eventually decide it isn’t for you - which is also fine because Uni isn’t the be all and end all. There are other options that might be really positive for you - so keep an open mind about that. However if you want to stick with Uni it’s certainly worth searching out all the support you can and trying to make it work - and give it more time before making a decision. 
    Good luck - and don’t worry - whether you choose to stay or to leave it’s not the end of the world. You’ll find your way in time either way :) 

  • I think three weeks is far too soon to be thinking about dropping out! Focus on getting through one day at a time.

    I would keep talking to the disability service and speak to your tutor. I know that's hard, but it's better to tell them before it gets too much than afterwards (believe me, I learnt that the hard way). If you can't leave your flat, send an email and flag it urgent.

    I obviously can't guarantee anything, but from my experience of struggling through two degrees (with depression, my ASD wasn't diagnosed then), universities are reasonably accommodating. They don't want you to fail, not least because it would reflect badly on them. Try to work out what specific adjustments you would like in advance of speaking to your tutor e.g. advance warning of timetable changes or someone to tell the lecturers not to run over time. The disability service might be able to help you with this, as they've probably had autistic students before.

    I hope some of this helps. Just keep going, one day at a time.

  • Bureaucracy causes many organisations work following a joke from Warhammer: ''Chaos is chasing women in the village'', meaning it's total chaos. 

    I would think finding out schedule is small beans, it might only seem like chaotic and there are patterns you haven't noticed yet, and anyway you'll get used to

  • Bear with it.  You will discover that many other students feel the same.