Does anyone elses child go uncontrollably crazy when its time to leave an activity or when having to go to the bathroom for the morning or night time routine?
Does anyone elses child go uncontrollably crazy when its time to leave an activity or when having to go to the bathroom for the morning or night time routine?
poor rachel, not,,,, the original post should have been pulled off or edited by the NAS due to the wording, they are quick enough to crack down on any autistic members postings !
the word crazy being used to describe an autistic childs behaviour and association with the word crazy with autistic people is offensive and hurtful
I notice that NT's are very good are negating there actions as okay.
Hi - like Christine I've thought "long + hard" before posting a 2nd time on Rachel's post. I can see the different points of view. I can understand why autistic people would find it offensive. However NTs need time to learn about autism + how it affects their child. I don't think any NT person would disagree with that. It is very much a learning experience, also an emotional journey. Rachael used that term with an NT frame of mind + not to cause offence. With the passage of time she probably wd have described the situation differently as she gained more understanding. It's important that those who are looking for support in whatever form can access this site as it will be a benefit regardless of whether they're autistic or NT. Like Christine, I don't want to cause any problems by posting this, my finger is dithering around the delete button, but I do think it's very important that a mother with an autistic child who needs to understand + learn can feel welcome here. Saying that I do sincerely appreciate why some were offended + responded accordingly. I do understand that we need to be careful with the words we use, some words used by NTs are used in a kind of "shorthand way" so that was why I asked Rachael to elaborate. Best wishes (bw) as usual to everyone in the community. If I've caused any offence with this post then I too apologise in advance. I think we've all made relevant points which will be taken on board. PS : about 50% of the time the nas smileys don't work (at least not for me)
This post has got completely out of hand. I am being very careful in what I write, as I am really not trying to offend anyone, and I do not think that Rachel would have wanted to offend anyone when she wrote her post. Ok, she should maybe not have used the "C" word, but she did - I am sure she deeply regrets this and will never do so again, but is there any need for the aggression in the replies?
I have thought long and hard before replying to this, and am rather nervours to do so, as I am worried about the insuing onslaught, but I honestly feel terrible for poor rachel, who came on this discussion forum to get helpful advice and has recieved a barrage of abuse.
This is really rather sad. Do you think that Rachel will ask for advice on this web site again? I rather think not, and I, personally wont be using this discussion forum again. My life is already full of little minefields every day without putting myself on here for more hassle.
To anyone I offended, I am truly sorry.
Rachel, I wish you well, and please take heart in that there are other Autism Support Networks on the web that you can get advice from.
Christine
All I wanted was to find out why my son gets so distressed in the bathroon so I could help him. I have done some research and comic strip with Joshua to get an idea how I could releave him from the stress. Now I have ordered a padded toilet seat, as he told me the other one is to hard. I also found some strawberry toothpaste as the mint one stings his mouth. I am a caring mother and finger crossed that this will help to releave some of the stress my son has to deal with. If it does i will post it on the site to help others.
NAS5794 said:Maybe crazy was a little strong, but mad is certainly a word I could see myself using if this situation were mine. That's simply the way people talk, and as long as no offence is meant by it that's fine with me. It's best not to have too much of an "us and them" attitude.
I'm not going to write what I really want to write in response to this (which woud be something along the lines of "I think you're an [insert some extremely offensive statement here], but I mean no offence by that", because it quite simply is not fine to say something offensive, even if no offence was meant.
It is also not okay to dismiss a person's feelings as if they do not matter, when they point out that your statement has caused them offense.
It is, however, okay to unwittingly say something offensive, and to then apologise for it when it is pointed out.
Azalea, the words.., crazy, mad have an extremely negative connotation to use them in autistic setting and is disrespectful to those on the spectrum, especially from a carer or parent. No offence taken and offence meant are two different things. For me the issue is more that autistic people like myself take these words literally and thus it has impact. So, the post title "My Autistic Child goes crazy" "Does anyone elses child go uncontrollably crazy when its time to leave an activity or when having to go to the bathroom for the morning or night time routine"?.. it really upsets me. Joshua behaviour nor Joshua is CRAZY ? It is not nice to use this word on an autistic forum or talk in this context regarding your own child. I would say that Rachel has not developed good knowledge of Autism and how it effects those with autism and those around him. Using insensitive language about the condition would express the opposite conclusion.
At the same time, I understand with my autism condition, I am hyposensitive and having a literal interpretation and an emotional response on the word "CRAZY", in the context of Autism. Am I being oversensitive or does Rachel not understand the impact her wording causes ? I think the words crazy nor mad should be used in the field of autism, I am sure that was doctor, therapist or carer using those words, they would not be in job for long.
I am actually thinking now,, am I crazy and being crazy writing this post ? see how effect my confidence and self-esteem by doubting myself,, am I crazy ?
Autismtwo
Whilst I understand that you do not favour the word 'crazy', your comments are not constructive. I would just like to reiterate that I used the word crazy to describe my sons change in behaviour, not that he was or is crazy. I may have articulated this better, but this was my first post on the forum and my aim was just to share an experience.
I have lived with Joshua who is on the autistic spectrum, ADHD and sensory for more than 8 years; therefore, I have developed a good knowledge of both autism and ADHD and how it impacts his life and those around him.
Christine
Thanks for your supportive comments.
quote "Autismtwo, I dont think Rachel meant her child was crazy, just that he sometimes acts crazy."
sorry rachel, christine,, with autism I take words literal, so even Christine stating "just that he sometimes acts crazy." ... again has literal effect on me,,, you are saying he is crazy.. even though soften down with sometimes..
Please can you stop using the word crazy in association with autism it is 21st century !.
cra·zy
Hi Rachel,
He might be really anxious as to what is coming next when transitioning from one activity to another. How old is he? I have to give my 4 year old lots of warning before finishing an activity, I give a 10 min warning, then a 5 min and then 2 and 1. This helps. You may also need to explain what is happening next, and if he does not understand maybe you could use visual timetables or signs?
As for the toilet, just give it time and positive reinforcement, my son was the same, but is ok now with the toilet.
Autismtwo, I dont think Rachel meant her child was crazy, just that he sometimes acts crazy.
Christine
Does anyone elses child hate sitting on the toilet seat? Mine stands over the toilet often standing on the seat and would rather poo on paper if he had his own way.
We will be at a group which he enjoys, he will be as good as gold but as soon as he notices people tidying away he starts this awful laugh runs in to the kitchen and jumps through the serving hatch, hides behind the blinds jumps on chairs and i struggle to get him out. Yesterday we went to a relatives house who has a train it the garden again as good as gold but when its time to go he starts the same sort of behaviour. The bathroon thing is the same.
Hi Rachellouise - sounds like your child is overly excited and/or anxious with some changes to what they're doing. Does your child have particular issues with using the bathroom - has anything changed in that respect? Also, cd you describe uncontrollably crazy as it'll help posters with their replies + hopefully help you + your child also.
