• Replies 22 replies
  • Subscribers 39 subscribers
  • Views 4732 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Should people with Aspergers or others on the autistic spectrum have children?

NAS78513

I've got it mildly (officially anyway, I think I might have been wrongly diagnosed, but that's a different story) and it's only got better as I've got older (some experts do think that it can actually go away as you get older, but again, another story). Even so, it has caused me some problems, especially when I was younger. I have no doubt that my life would've been easier without it. Anyway, I sort of want children but sort of don't, for a few reasons, one of which would be giving it to them (if I've got it, perhaps I'm just a little odd lol). What are the chances that they'd get it, and (this is a bit controversial I know) do you think people with it who have children are selfish? It can and does cause an awful lot of misery.

Parents

  • Goodness, you do sound a little confused about your own ASD status...you aren't sure you are autistic, but it caused problem. It sounds like either you have a problem other than autism or you are autistic but have learned a good many coping strategies to get by. In your shoes I'd want a full, honest re-assessment so I could accept and relax with whatever the truth is. None of us should live life in a box we don't belong in, but none of us can live life in denial of who we are.

    As for having children, if you really want to be a parent, have the love to give and are prepared for the sacrifices, have them. If you are half-hearted about it, don't. Autism is just a different wiring and autistic people can contribute a lot BECAUSE of their autism often, rather than inspite of it. Yes, you could pass it on, but you might also be gifting the world another Greta Thunberg. No child comes with guarantees. Every child has their gifts and challenges. You get what you are given and love them as they are with all your heart. 

    At the end of the day, autism persists in the human genome because it has advantages and we shouldn't breed that out. I'll never regret having my son for sure. He's the light of my life.

    And the day I got my diagnosis, I danced around my living room thanking God for creating me exactly as I am. For every problem my autism brought me, I also have a gift. Both the best of me and my shortcomings are autistic ones and I wouldn't have it any other way. I hope any autistic children you have feel the same way. With the love of supportive parents they'd have every chance of growing up happy little auties.

  • in reply to Dawn

    It filled me with happiness to read yours and 's stories. 

Reply Children