How is it that even if there's a population of over 7 billion, you sometimes feel like you're outside this world. I suppose that's what being autistic, as I am. Believe me I have had this feeling before. You observe everyone that is around you, their habits, their body language, what they say, do, eat, drink, think etc. You know that not one person is the same, but you are left baffled by some of things you see and hear, and in certain times, can even overwhelm you. Trust me, I know this from experience. Even the simplest of words or slight of gestures, can make you feel exasperated, and not in a good way. It's also not just people within this world that we confusing, but also the world itself. Why does it keep changing? Why is it keep being taken for granted? Why is it sometimes so noisy and crowded? Why are their so many beautiful sights and wonders to see, but not enough time to experience the wonders themselves? All these questions in my mind add more to barrel of chaos and confusion within me. As being autistic, everything we process from what we see, hear or feel, takes longer to process than a non-autistic person. It forces us to withdraw within ourselves and wait until the twister inside of us, containing every physical sensation we experience, has calmly settled and we are able to see the whole picture clearly in our brains and we can allow ourselves to experience outwardly moments.
Felt like I dragged on a bit. Be honest.
