Do you guys actually care about this?

Difficult one.

I've always believed each person has an absolute right to self-define anything about themselves, whether their autism, race, sexuality, gender, whatever.  I understand that other people might struggle to keep up with the preferred terms and worry about committing a faux pas if picking the wrong one.  

I think ultimately as long as there is no intent to insult, people will respect it if you say:  "I prefer X because of y". I wouldn't get upset if people didn't immediately pick what I would prefer.  That said certain terms like "different" rather than "disabled" create a useful, more positive shift in the discourse.

Difficult one.

I've always believed each person has an absolute right to self-define anything about themselves, whether their autism, race, sexuality, gender, whatever.  I understand that other people might struggle to keep up with the preferred terms and worry about committing a faux pas if picking the wrong one.  

I think ultimately as long as there is no intent to insult, people will respect it if you say:  "I prefer X because of y". I wouldn't get upset if people didn't immediately pick what I would prefer.  That said certain terms like "different" rather than "disabled" create a useful, more positive shift in the discourse.