Hello, this is my first time using the community discussion. My 12 yr old daughter is now refusing to wash. She will not have a bath, shower or wash her hair or brush her teeth. Has anybody got any tips or advise. I would be most grateful even for the smallest tip.
Many Thanks
Ringo
Hey,
We were having the same problem with my brother. We have now been using the Dignity Waterless Shampoo and it's made a massive difference. Before we would have to chase him around the house and try wrestle with him. When we first tried to use the Waterless Shampoo with him, he would run away but after a few attempts he now sits still. The product is towel dried and then combed out, (he doesnt like the combing), but we manage to get a few brushes and a quick towel dry and the product still works really well! Hopefully, you may find this useful.
Hi. My son is 12 and hasn't wanted to take care of his personal hygeine for almost 2 years now. I've been told that with him having Aspergers his senses are heightened and he feels things 100 times more than anybody else without Aspergers/autism. What I've done is buy him the really cheap toothpaste as it doesn't have the strong flavours as the major brands. He HATES deoderant and I am constantly telling him to use it so now he has his own roll on. I'm really struggling to get him to take care of himself and with him almost being a teenager he can have quite a strong smell of body odour. He's still not willing to try the new things I've bought him but I really do hope he will in time. He wouldn't sit in the dentist chair, instead he opted to scream to everyone in the waiting room that the dentist had a rusty meat cleaver waiting for them and that they were going to die from radiation poisoning from the x ray machine. My long term partner left last week as he couldn't take my son with his problems anymore. It's broken me, truly broken me as we were going to marry this year. Yes my children do come first but it doesn't stop this terrible hurt. xox
hey ringo. hope you are well. im thinking the same as mummy pig as, my daughter was the same when younger, tried everything from reading books to puppet's, you name it...then we decided to reward with something she really likes and low and behold she loved it and now is part of her routine...still to this day she will happily, jump in a bath(not shower as sensory) wash hair and do teeth...all with this reward system, and making it fun too.
but if this was not to work, as everyone is unique..possibly allowing her to choose the shampoo, or allow her to run her own bath(with your supervision if needed) can maybe make a difference...
it could be just the age she is becoming, as it is a very difficult age. so as mummypig says it maybe a losing battle to speak with her, but on the other side maybe that is what she is needing, a mother's ear. someone to talk to, but maybe doesnt know how to......
i hope some of this advice maybe helfull to you, goodluck too you and your daughter.
Hi Ringo
Does your daughter have a special interest? My son is only 6 but I have found that anything he is resistant to or has stopped has been spurred along by using his special interest in some way. E.g. Pilots have to wash or else the passengers on the plan wouldnt fly with him (his special interest is aeroplanes). I know this is simplistic for age 6 but could be adapted somehow for an adolescent? Trying to find the reason why is so difficult and can be a losing battle, it's sometimes better to keep the possible reasons in mind whilst doing some experiments. I hope this is useful in some way - thanks for sharing :-)
Ringo said:Hello, this is my first time using the community discussion. My 12 yr old daughter is now refusing to wash. She will not have a bath, shower or wash her hair or brush her teeth. Has anybody got any tips or advise. I would be most grateful even for the smallest tip.
Many Thanks
Ringo
Hi Ringo,
My son does similar things. He only has to hear or watch something on the TV and he will then decide he cannot do it. I have always had problems getting him to brush his teeth, he always protests that he does not like the mint although he will eat extra strong mints. He is not great at washing and will never do it on his own I always have to supervise him to make sure he does it. I think his issues are also sensory. I will read this thread with interest to see if anyone has any solutions.
Hi Ringo,
Here are links to a couple of short articles here on the website:
http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/understanding-behaviour/behaviour-common-questions-answered/any-tips-on-teaching-my-son-self-help-skills.aspx
Hope you'll find something relevant and of interest in there.
It's interesting that your daughter has just suddenly decided to stop doing these things - I suppose the million dollar question is why now? Have you got any ideas what might have caused this change? I hope some of our other users will be able to pass on their own experiences and ideas.
Good luck to you.
Sandra
Hi,
Can your daughter say why?
I could understand not washing OR not hair washing OR not cleaning teath, but all at the same time sounds like something she may have heard or read rather than a sensory issue.
Actually, just thought, could she be worried about the water after hearing about the radiation problems in Japan?
