Coping with autism

I’ve struggled with my traits so much that when I was told I was almost certainly autistic, at first I dismissed it, then came a period of intense hatred for the fact I’m so weird, eventually a begrudging acceptance. Probably not the same process for all but it’s difficult and you are not alone :) You’ll be ok, you got this :)

Hello Janet. There are some counseling services that can help you address this issue. There are many online communities as well that support autism. I hope you that you get the right support system for you. 

The double-edged sword.

For me its a burden and a gift, I can be super anti social and anxious for no reason, yet certain substances make me feel more normal, such as Valium and certain stims. BUT neither of these are good for your health long term and they can be addictive so Id advice against them, I feel my Autism has given me the smarts, yet the ability to be social  is difficult. Im easily distracted yet I can be hyper focused on a project then a few weeks later ill drop it because it becomes boring and I move onto something else.

I think medication helps, because they effect the dopamine system which makes you feel good and activates the reward system which gives you the drive to get things done. I have a degree in pharmacology so I know what Im doing, I just wish I didn't have to take medication.

I do feel at times that when people find out Im autistic they think im stupid, might just me being paranoid, IDK.
When my brother was in a wheel chair, people would often talk down to him,he had broken legs not a broken brain.
Yet people treated him differently like a child, very annoying.

Welcome to the forum, Janet.

Yes, many of us have been through a period of being unsure what to make of it when we've discovered that we're autistic; I know I certainly did! I think it's important to remind yourself that "autism" is just a convenient term to describe things that were always there - you haven't changed in the slightest, and there's no need to change anything unless you can see a good reason to. Getting to know other autistic people on forums like this one is the best thing you could do, in my opinion. It may take a little time for things to settle down a bit, but this is helped enormously by finding other people who share similar traits and maybe have some useful advice to help you to get them straight in your mind and to cope with them better.

The people here are all incredibly generous with their help, and as most of us are also autistic, there's no need to worry about talking about things which you may have been scared or embarrassed to before - there's no such thing as a "dumb question", and no-one will mock you for admitting to "unusual" behaviours, as we all know just how it feels to get negative reactions from folks out there in "normal land".

I hope you find the forum as beneficial as I have, and best wishes.

Welcome, Janet. Absolutely. In the few years up to my diagnosis, when I first suspected that I might be, I kept thinking I was imagining it, perhaps due to years of masking. It's still a journey of self-discovery, but has been very beneficial. How are you finding things post-diagnosis, if you don't mind sharing?