"I don't mind" vs. "I don't care"

Nessie said:

Are these the same thing or is there some subtle difference that I'm missing? To me "I don't mind" is what NTs say when they don't care, whereas I just say it like it is. People always seem slightly taken aback when I say I don't care, but it's honest—maybe too honest.

Examples: What would you like for dinner? Which shops would you like to browse in? When would you like to book a holiday? How would you like the flower girls to have their hair at our wedding?

"I don't mind" can mean that someone is interested either way regarding a choice or choices being made by someone else, and "I don't care" can mean that someone is not interested in another person's choice or choices ~ and is therefore more likely to be considered as being dismissive and offensive. 

Or in other words, "I don't mind" involves more the heart or feelings being invested in the wisdom or thoughtful governance of one or more other people in terms of their decision making processes, and "I don't care" involves then not caring for which involving little or no feeling for others feelings or thoughts.

"I don't mind" can as such be considered warm-hearted or considerate, and "I don't care" cold-hearted or inconsiderate, therefore.

Thank you, Deepthought, that's a huge help and does make sense. I will have to start learning to say "I don't mind" as part of my mask in pretending to care about other people and their choices.

Thank you, Deepthought, that's a huge help and does make sense. I will have to start learning to say "I don't mind" as part of my mask in pretending to care about other people and their choices.

I don't think it is a question of pretending to care about other people and their choices. 'I don't mind' means that you really don't have any real preference between two choices or suggestions or that each option is equal to you. 'I don't care' is often used when being actively dismissive of someone else's preferences.