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Independence

NAS64519
over 4 years ago

Can i ask for any young people with autism that may be able to add there story so my son does not feel he is the only one going through his problem. He is 19 and goes to a special needs 6th form. He is worried and gets upset because he feels he can not handle college or getting a job. He only goes out if he has family or school with him, never on his own. Can i ask if any other young people are the same in this respect to share so he will not feel alone. Thank u.

  • over 4 years ago

    I am pre-diagnosis and I am 23 but my inability to socialise in a work environment has had a very negative effect on me. I often don't understand why I am being told off/what I have done if I am called into the office, I don't understand jokes or sarcasm and I cannot mix work relationships with outside relationships which means I cannot approach colleges and make small talk and being asked to engage in such conversations causes me a lot of anxiety. It is hard because my previous boss called me into the office and told me that she was worried about me not interacting with the staff as it would make it uncomfortable for both me and the other staff if we didn't talk to each other. She even suggested conversation topics like the weather to me... well, this only made me more anxious about it. I believe that with a diagnosis things will be much easier as your sons future boss will not assume that he is just being rude if a similar situation occurs. 

  • over 4 years ago in reply to NAS64519

    It is a difficult time going into the unknown world of employment. I can understand why your son is having trouble absorbing the idea. It’s a big change that should be approached gently without any forcing of the issue IMO.

    I am 63, so when I was your son’s age I hadn’t heard of autism. My recollections are rather vague.

    There is an organisation that helps with the transition to employment, it also gives training to young people. It’s specifically for the 16 to 25 age group. Maybe they can help. https://www.ambitiousaboutautism.org.uk/

  • over 4 years ago in reply to Graham Slight Return

    Thank you Graham this gives me a few things to think about. I would like to know if any other autistic teens have problems going out by themselves or have melt downs at the thought of getting a job.Slight smileny input would be appreciated. Slight smile

  • over 4 years ago

    Hello,

    Moving outside of a small group into the wider world can be a difficult time for most autistic people. Does your son have have any special interests or hobbies? If so, he may be able to find an online group that he can join and start to converse with others. If there is a shared interest, it takes away the struggle to find something to say or contribute.

    There also may be an autistic meet up group in your area. I find I am much more at ease speaking to some autistic people in a social situation than I am speaking to non-autistics.

    Does he have any idea of what type of employment he would like to be in? There seems to be a movement towards accepting that autistic people make ideal candidates for working in the field of autism support. This may interest him, particularly as he has a head start in understanding autism.

    You may also like to post your question on the twitter tags #AskingAutistics  #ActuallyAutistic #neurodiversity   There is quite a helpful community on twitter, and there may well be some schemes I don’t know about. All the best, Graham.